Family Through Time
by Whas'up
Summary: Nine got Rose pregnant, Nine turned into Ten, Rose gave birth to James, Rose was lost to a parallel world, and Ten was left raising a baby by himself, AU. Until a certain red headed bride took pity on him and said 'yes.' Not strictly a Ten/Donna fic.
1. Chapter 1

**AUTHORS NOTE: Hi! Thanks to Helena012 on youtube for posting all the episodes I hadn't seen so that I could write this! Ta!**

Rose turned as an almost transclucent image of the Doctor appeared, holding James to his chest, the baby wrapped in his favorite red blanket, sleeping quietly. Rose jogged forward, her arms outstrectched for the child, only to have the Doctor shake his head, stilling her instantly with those sad eyes.

She stopped, slipping slightly in the wet sand, still peering at the baby, "Where are you?" she asked.

"Inside the Tardis," the Doctor said, shifting James, rocking him gently as his big blue eyes began to open. "There's one tiny little gap in the universe left. Just about to close. And it takes alot of power to send this projection, i'm in orbit around a supernova," he smiled distantly, "I'm burning up a sun just to say goodbye."

Rose bit her lip, gesturing at the Doctor and James, "You look like ghosts," she said quietly.

The Doctor reached into his pocket with his free hand and pulled out the sonic screwdriver, "Hold on," he said, adeptly using one hand to switch the settings on the screwdriver. He pointed it towards where Rose knew the control console would be, his image and James instantly becoming solid.

"Can I touch-" Rose asked, her hand hovering over her babies pale cheek.

He shook his head, looking down at him with those sad brown eyes, "We're still just an image," he swallowed and looked down at James, "No touch."

"Can't you come through properly? Send James at least?" she pleaded, looking up at him, her fingers still lingering over her babies cheek.

"The whole thing would fracture. Two universes would collapse."

"So?" she asked, a fierce longing filing her eyes as she looked at her family, the man she loved and their child.

He chuckled, even though they both knew it was no joke, she looked away first, swiping her flying hair out of her face as she took a calming breath. He peered down at her until she looked back at him, her brown eyes filled with unshed tears. The Doctor looked around suddenly, "Where are we? Where did the gap come out?" he asked.

"We're in Norway," she said, her voice cracking, her lower lip trembling as her eyes traveled over the contors of James's face.

The Doctor nodded absently, "Norway, right."

They fell quiet, their line of conversation stilted as they both looked at their child, "I've missed you so much," Rose said, looking up at the Doctor, "Both of you."

"I know, I know," the Doctor said his own tears already threatening to spill over.

"How long have we got?" she gasped out, swiping her tears off her cheeks.

"Two minutes."

"I don't know what to say," she sobbed, her fingers ghosting over every available inch of the Doctor and James. "I love you both so much," she cried, "Make sure he knows how much I love him, please, Doctor, promise me!"

"I do, I promise, I'll tell him every day," the Doctor whispered, leaning towards Rose, knowing that she wanted one good look at her child.

"And you, oh darling, I miss you, I want to hold you, I love you," she told the baby, staring into the babies open blue eyes. James, sensing his mothers distress through the void began to wail tragically, fat wet tears running down his cheeks. "No, no, sh, please don't cry, I love you, I love you more then anything!" Rose looked up at the Doctor tears streaming down her face, "I love you," she told him.

He smiled sadly, nodding, "Quite right too," he said, "I love you too, Rose Tyler, I love you," he looked down at the screaming baby in his arms, "I'll tell him all about you, how wonderful you are. How brilliant. Do you hear me?" He looked up at her, "I love you-"

And his image went away, leaving Rose on the beach, leaving her to collapse on the wet sand, sobbing through her hoarse throat, her mothers arms encircling her seconds later.

**DISCLAIMER: If it were mine you'd be crying every week...**


	2. Chapter 2

**AUTHORS NOTE: Hello! How are you? Perhaps it would make you feel better to review, eh?**

Donna turned, flinching as the sound of a screaming child reached her ears, she found herself standing in front of a tall man holding a baby in his arms, tears streaming down both their faces. She walked towards the man, knowing that he had yet to see her, too preoccupied by his grief to do much but clutch the child. She stood in front of him, peering at him, her anger subsiding only a little.

His head jerked up, his mouth opening in shock, he swallowed, looking like a fish out of water, "What?" he asked, his hoarse voice filled with the weight of his grief.

"Who are you?" Donna asked, her voice lowered into what could have been called an conversational tone, except for the tiny trace of anger in her inflection.

He swallowed again, "The Doctor," he said, instinctively pulling the screaming baby closer to his chest, trying to calm his high pitched cries, he hesitated when he saw Donna looking at the baby, finally saying, "My-my son, James."

Donna nodded, taking another step towards them, "Why's he screaming like that? Is he hurt?" she asked, her blue eyes scanning over what she could see of James, quickly assessing that the child had not been physically harmed. "No," she said, answering her own question, "Alright then, is he hungry, when did he last get fed?" she asked, looking back up at the Doctor.

He blinked at her, shaking his head, "What?" he asked, his exasperated voice.

She tilted her head at him sadly, "When did your son eat last?" she asked, gesturing at the baby. She looked around suddenly, peering at the Tardis skeptically, "Supposing you have a kitchen at all that is. What is this place?"

He licked his lips, "The Tardis," he told her.

"The Tardis, alright," she said, nodding as she took that piece of information in. "This is what we're going to do, Doctor."

The Doctor nodded silently.

"Hand me James, and you go and you make him a bottle." She raised her arms, motioning slowly for him to give her the baby, "And when you get back you'll explain what I'm doing here, who you are, and whether or not you kidnapped me."

The Doctor nodded hollowly, he placed the baby in her waiting arms, looking at him for just a moment before stepping away and walking through the doorway towards the kitchen, going to grab one of the premade bottles that Rose always made for James. Donna sighed, watching the man leave the room as she gently rocked the wailing baby. "Hush now," she admonished quietly, looking down at the baby and smiling. Donna moved the blanket away from James's head, squeaking in amusement as she saw his hair, it was dark blonde with more then a hint of red, "Look at that," she whispered, her fingers running through his soft hair, "we almost match."

James's wails turned into tiny heart breaking sniffles as Donna continued to walk slowly around the console in the middle of the room, talking to him, "There we are, sweetheart," she said, rocking him with one arm, her other hand pulling the veil from her head. "Missing my wedding for this, you're not half bad though," she said, looking down at him as she lazily threw the veil onto the jumpseat. She looked away from the baby, finally seeing the doors, she moved towards them curiously, opening them warily.

Donna sighed loudly, letting out a forceful breath of air as she saw what was outside the doors. A nebula or something she surmised, it was rather lovely she thought, a swirling mass of pink and purple, set against the deepest of blacks. "You're in space," a voice said from behind her. She turned her head minutely to look at the Doctor, "Outer space," he continued, "This is my..." he hesitated, Donna decided she didn't care, "My spaceship. It's called-"

"The Tardis, yeah," she said, looking up at him as she took the bottle from his hands. "We're breathing," she said, nudging the rubber nipple of the bottle against James's lips, smiling slightly when he gulped the liquid down. "What's protecting us?" she asked.

The Doctor looked at her appraisingly, his eyebrows raised appreciatively, "Yeah, the Tardis is, protecting us, I mean. And you are?" he asked.

"Donna," she said, looking back out the doors.

He looked her up and down, "Human?"

Donna sighed again, a world weary sigh, "Yeah," she told him, shaking her head irritably, "Is that optional?" she quipped.

"It is with me," he said.

"You're an alien," she said, chuckling weakly, "Should have know, what with the spaceship or whatever this is." She smiled down at the baby in her arms, "And this little one, your son, I suppose he'd be alien as well?"

"Yeah," the Doctor agreed, looking down at the peaceful baby in her arms in wonder, "You got him to stop," he said. Donna shrugged. "His mother and grandmother were the only ones who could make him so calm," he continued.

Donna squirmed uncomfortably, "It's freezing with these doors open," she told him, incling her head towards the doors. He leaned forward and closed the doors, still looking at Donna with an awe filled expression as she turned and walked back up the ramp, he followed her slowly.

"How did I get here?" she asked, standing next to the console. The Doctor the rambled on about things Donna didn't understand, but he really started to irritate her when he fished a odd looking tool out of a belt and started to look at her through it, still talking. Donna knew that if both her hands were free she would have slapped the good for nothing man straight across the face, but seeing as she was holding an infant she could not. "Oi!" she screamed, her raised voice shocking the Doctor out of his ramblings.

He looked at her for many moments, obviously thinking about something else, "Right, best get you to the church," he told her tonelessly, running around her towards the console. "Where is this wedding?"

"Saint Mary's, Haven road, Chiswick, London, England, Earth, the solar system," she said in quick succession, moving away from him slightly.

The Doctor looked up at her, a small smile on his lips, "Precise," he said, one corner of his lip reaching higher then the other.

Donna started slightly when she caught sight of a purple top thrown over a railing, she walked towards it curiously, hunching over to whisper to the baby in her arms, "Is that your mum's?" she asked him. No hands free meant she couldn't pick it up, but as she looked at it she realized it had a logo, it was for young people, younger then her at least, those clothes, "A young little thing then," she smiled, "your mum, yeah?"

"She's ninteen," a voice from the console said.

Donna almost jumped out of her skin, turning to the Doctor, shocked that he had heard her, "A _really_ young little thing then," she corrected.

"She's gone," he said, looking down at the monitor, "I lost her."

"I'm sorry," Donna said. A second later she almost fell off her feet as the Tardis landed.

Donna exited the Tardis, shaking her head when she realized it was bigger on the inside, shaking her head again when she realized the Doctor had landed in the wrong place. She handed the baby to the Doctor, muttering a quiet, "See ya Jamie," before walking off, leaving the Doctor rambling in an alleyway.

A few moments later, the Doctor showed up behind her, without James, explaining hurriedly that the Tardis was perfectly capable of caring for the baby as well as any human babysitter.

OOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOO

Donna leapt from the moving taxi, knocking the thin Doctor over and landing on him, they locked eyes immedietly and she scambled off of him, James's shrill cries almost piercing her eardrums as the Tardis doors slammed shut. Donna climbed to her feet slowly, walking on shaking legs towards the car seat attached to the jump seat, "All that noise, sweetheart, hush now," she whispered when she drew up next to him, trying in vain to smooth his bright hair down.

Smoke was filing the Tardis and Donna cast a concerned eye at the control console as the Doctor ran forward, pressing buttons and flicking switches, landing them with a thump. Donna quickly detached the baby from the car seat, walking out the Tardis doors as the Doctor grabbed a fire extinguisher and followed her, randomly firing the extinguisher.

Donna took a deep breath of air when she got out of the Tardis, looking down at James, making sure he was alright and trying to calm him. "It's alright," she assured him, bouncing him against her shoulder, rubbing soothing circles on his back, catching a quick glimpse of her watch face and groaning quietly. She walked forward, away from the acrid smoke that burned her eyes, noticing that the Doctor had landed on a rooftop and that she could see over the skyline.

"Funny thing is," the Doctor said, drawing up behind her, "that for a space ship she doesn't do that much flying. Better give her a few hours. You alright?"

She shook her head, "Doesn't matter," she said quietly, looking down at the crying baby.

"Did we miss it?" the Doctor asked, making no move to take the baby from her.

"Yeah," she said, she laughed suddenly, moving James to her other shoulder, "Wish that Tardis," she said, jerking her head towards the ship, "was a time machine. Then we could go back and do it right. Bet it's like those 'Back the future' films though, yeah? Personal timelines and such," she said as she made a truly amusing face for James's benefit, smiling genuinly as the baby smiled through his tears. She didn't notice the Doctor's shocked and truly amazed face as she moved forward and manuevered the baby so she could sit down on the roof top, her legs dangling off the side, the baby sitting on her lap.

Donna lurched forward when she felt the heavy weight of the Doctor's jacket was thrown over her shoulders, a moment later though she realized how cold she had been and she snuggled deeper into it's warm depths. "God, you're skinny," she said as she tried to get the coat to cover both her and the baby, "this wouldn't fit a rat."

"You'd better put this on," the Doctor said, rummaging through his pants pocket, finally extracting a golden ring.

Donna began to laugh, holding the baby closer to her, holding her hand out good naturedly, "Not the man I wanted, but at least it's a ring," she gasped out.

"What? No, it's a bio-damper-"

Donna shook her head, waving his words away, smiling, "I was joking, you Martian!"

He smiled back at her briefly, "With this ring, I thee bio-damp," he said popping the 'p' as he slipped the ring on her outstretched hand.

"For better or for worse," she said, looking at the ring as it glinted in the winter sunshine. "Those robot Santa's," she said at last, looking back up at him questioningly.

The Doctor leapt into an explanation, moving his hands rapidly as he explained about last Christmas, giant spaceship over London (Donna had a bit of a hangover). Asking why the robots would want Donna, demanding an explanation of who she was, where she worked, who she was marrying, finally ending with the conclusion that she wasn't important, or special, and having absolutely no idea why the santa's were after her. Which made Donna sort of miserable, but she took it in stride, clutching the baby closer to her, snuggling deeper into the coat and leaning down to smell his soft red hair. Only looking up when the Doctor asked her about Lance, which she explained with a smile, before shaking her head, "Come on, time to face the consequences, you can do the explaining, Martian boy."

He made to stand up, shaking his head, "I'm not from Mars," he repeated, holding a hand out for her to take and helping her up.

OOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOO

After screaming at the Doctor for even contemplating leaving his baby in the smoke filled Tardis, the three strode into Donna's reception, which was going in full swing, even though the bride wasn't present. Donna's brow furrowed sadly, her eyes narrowed in anger, she held James close to her breast, nuzzling her chin against his hair as she stopped feet away from the dance floor. Her mother and father were dancing, her mothers smile faltering when she saw Donna. Her best friend, Nerrys, and her fiance, Lance, were dancing, until Nerry's grabbed his arm and pointed at Donna. "You had the reception without me," Donna said, making it sound like a question even though it was not.

"Donna," Lance said, not stepping away from the blonde and leggy Nerrys, "what happened to ya?" he asked, one hand raised halfway up, almost reaching out to her, but not really.

"You had the reception without me!" she yelled, accusation clear in her voice.

The Doctor leaned forward, possibly hoping to dispell the awkwardness, but only increasing it, "Hello," he greeted, "I'm the Doctor," Donna turned to look at him, moving James into his view with a raised eyebrow, "ah, right, and that's James," he finished lamely, inching back.

Donna rolled her eyes, "They had the reception without me," she told him over her shoulder.

"Yes, I gathered that," the Doctor said, smiling without humor.

"Well it was all paid for!" Donna's friend called out, "So why not?" she said, a sneer on her pretty face.

Then, sensing the blood in the water most likely, the crowd moved in, yelling things at Donna, questions and insults liberly shouted. And Donna wilted visibly, sinking her center closer to the sleeping baby in her arms, but she remained strong, not uttering a single thing. Until her mother, gesturing at the sleeping baby, yelled, "And who's kid is that? You're biological clock go mad and you steal a baby out of a strangers pram?"

"Shut it!" Donna shouted, her fierce blue eyes looking up instantly, "You don't know anything!" she turned to the crowd, glaring at them, red hair shining brightly in the dark hall, "You lot! Back off! Now!"

The Doctor looked at the dispersing crowd, most of them going to the bar, and then back at seething Donna, still glaring at her mother. "This is James," Donna said quietly clenched teeth, "The Doctor's son."

Her mother looked like she wanted to say more, but the restraining hand of Donna's father held her back, pulled her away, back to the dance floor as the music began again. Lance stepped closer, smiling at Donna, holding his and out invitingly, wagling his eyebrows. Donna rolled her eyes, laughing, she turned to place the baby in the Doctors arms, but he flinched back, she eyed him strangley, wondering if he'd always been so uncomfortable around his own son. She turned to the nearest table, "Aunt Miranda? Hold him would you?" she asked, placing the baby in the trusted arms of her Aunt, on her fathers side, "His name is James, if he wakes shout, yeah? she said, already moving towards Lance.

Later, after Donna had danced with both her father and Lance she heard her name being yelled across the hall. She turned in time to see the Doctor leap over a table, an impressive feat, "Donna, they've found you," he said without preamble.

"But you said I was safe," she said, looking up at him in horror.

"The bio-damper doesn't work, we've got to get everyone out!"

"Oh my god, it's all my family," Donna said quietly, looking around her at the oblivious people all around her.

"The back door!" the Doctor yelled, already running towards the exit. Donna was torn between following the Doctor or finding Aunt Miranda and James, finally deciding on finding the baby. She found the older woman sitting at a table, cooeing over the sleeping baby, a group of other woman surrounding them, "Miranda," Donna said, striding as calmly as she could, she reached forward for the baby, barely restraining herself from ripping the child from her aunts arms.

"What is it? Sweetheart?" the woman said, still sitting in her chair.

"Please give him to me," Donna said, leaning down and gently snatching the baby, holding the baby so tightly that she had to tell herself to calm down or risk crushing the poor child. Then the christmas tree decorations flew into the air and started blowing up. Donna dove behind a upturned table, her whole body wrapped around James, protecting him with her own body until a shrill noise filled her ears, she puther hands over the crying babies ears, trying to block the sound.

Then it was silent, Donna stood shakily, the wailing baby in her arms as she walked towards the Doctor, where he kneeled next five or six broken robot Santa's playing with one of their heads, muttering about a signal before running out of the room. Leaving his son and Donna behind.

With an irritated sound Donna strode after him, one hand holding up her wedding dress's skirt.

"Donna," her mother called after her, forcing Donna to stop and turn, the baby squirming in her arms. "Who is he? WHo is that man?" she asked, looking at Donna like she'd never seen her, her eyes lingering on he baby in her arms.

Donna said nothing, what was there to say? Donna didn't know who he was, knew him only as 'the Doctor', knew he lived in a space ship and was an alien, knew he was trying to protect her, knew that he'd probably just lost the woman he loved most in the whole world and had a son he didn't know how to care for. Donna looked at her mother sadly, before spinning on her heel and running out of the room, following the Doctor.

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Doctor Who, Back to the Future, or David Tennant....sigh.**


	3. Chapter 3

**AUTHORS NOTE: Come on and review, you know you wanna! Also, although this takes place during the Runaway Bride and onwards, it won't strictly follow those story lines. This chapter elaborates that pretty efficiently I think. Because a baby on the Tardis _would_ change the story, wouldn't it?**

Donna could think of no simpler explanation, the Doctor had ditched her. Run off with that robots head under his arm, muttering about a signal and HC Clemens, leaving her standing outside the reception hall with a baby that wasn't hers and a mother that wouldn't stop sneering.

Hours later Sylvia Noble sat down on the couch in her living room, a cup of tea in her hand, "Doesn't look a thing like him," she grumbled to her father, who was asleep on the floor in front of the television, shaking her head as she peered at the baby sleeping in the crib that Donna had improvised (a pillow flattened at the bottom of a laundry basket). "With that red hair he looks more like Donna's son then that Doctors," she said, leaning across the coffee table to run her fingers over the boys hair. With a small smile she traced the outside of James's ear, "Don't know where he got these Dumbo ears, maybe his mother, poor girl." James opened his eyes, as if sensing someone had insulted his ancestry and scowled, his blue eyes reminding Sylvia eerily of Donna.

Donna strode in, clad in the comfiest pair of jeans she owned and a dark purple sweater, her feet bare, her wedding dress now hanging in her closet next to her other outdated things, like her leopard print tights and burberry cap, "Oi!" she called softly, hands on her lips, indignant, "I like his ears."

Sylvia pursed her lips, leaning back into the couch, "Where is his mother?" she asked, peering at Donna with narrowed eyes.

"She's gone," Donna said simply, looking at her mother with _that_ face, the closed off face that she had perfected through her teenage years. Donna turned away from Sylvia, carefully stepping over her sleeping grandfather to reach down into the makeshift crib and pick James up.

"Hello," Donna greeted, smiling into James's open eyes, "Jamie, sweetheart, you stink," she said, laughing.

Sylvia set her tea down, "Babies do that from time to time," she said snidely, handing over the purse Donna had converted into a diaper bag.

Donna rolled her eyes, taking the baby, the bag, and going to the bathroom to change him. She kneeled down, spreading a towel out on the cold tiles before placing the baby down, smiling as he squirmed in discomfort, "Oh, hush, I'm the one that should be complaining," she told him, opening up the bag and hurriedly getting the gross deed done.

"It's been hours," Geoff Noble said, leaning against the door frame to the bathroom, "Do you know when your Doctor is meant to come back?" he asked, smiling as Donna buttoned up James's little baby pants.

"He's not _my_ anything," Donna sighed, sitting back, leaning agaisnt the bathtube, rubbing a hand over her eyes.

Geoff sat down across from her, sitting indian style like her between the toilet and the sink, in the tiny room their knees almost touched. "How are you, love?" he asked.

Donna shrugged.

"Now, now, don't give me that nonsense," her father said, pointing at her with an eyebrow raised. "It's a perfectly acceptable question."

"Oh Dad," she said, raising her hands in a clueless gesture, "I don't know."

"Tell me about it," he encouraged.

"I was supposed to be married," she said, one shoulder raised towards her chin, making her look like little girl again.

"I know, my girl."

She took a deep breath, "I was supposed to be married, but it all went wrong, I met the Doctor, and he left me with his son!" she said, her hand resting on James for a moment before running through her hair. Tears came to her eyes, and she cursed herself for being such a girl, "Dad, Lance won't answer his phone, I haven't seen him since the reception, and now the Doctor's swaned off without so much as a 'good bye', and," but she couldn't go on, it was too much for Donna Noble, she broke down into crying mess.

"It's alright," her father said, crawling over to her side, putting an arm around her shoulders.

She shook her head against his neck, gulping down her sobs, "Liar," she accused, a smile on her tear stained face.

And then a sound that neither of them had ever quite heard before filled their ears, although Donna suspected it didn't sound dissimilar to a moose dying. Or giving birth. Something very painful, she was sure. And though she didn't know what it was, she suspected that a certain man in pinstripes was responsible. She grabbed James, towel and all and ran out of the bathroom, leaving her confused father behind as she raced down the hall and threw open the door of her mothers house.

"_You_!" she screamed, pointing menacingly at the Doctor as he emerged from his ridiculous blue box, "Where have you _been_?" she screamed, not caring that everyone in a three block radius could probably hear her. She ran out into the middle of the street, James held securly to her chest as she jabbed the Doctor viciously with her accusing finger, "I'm not a baby sitting service, can't just swan off when you see something shiny, leaving me in the lurch!" Donna began to cry again, standing in front of that stupid martian, she hit her open palm agaisnt his chest, knocking him backwards an inch, "Where's Lance?" she asked, sure that he would know the answer.

He looked confused, then he looked sad, then he looked a distant sort of glad, "I'm sorry," he told her softly, "I'm sorry but he was working with the Empress of the Racnoss and that never works out well."

"What are you _talking_ about?" she screeched, feeling guilty when James began to wail, "What's happened to Lance?"

His gaze turned steely, "He's dead," he told her, hands in his pockets. She pursed her lips, tears still falling down her cheeks, she shook her head, stepping away from him. "He didn't love you, Donna," the Doctor continued, "He was using you, that's why you were pulled onto my ship, he was poisoning you with-"

"Shut up!" Donna screamed, flinching back from the Doctor like he'd smacked her, "Just stop!" she turned away from him, pulling the crying baby closer to her, trying to calm down.

The Doctor had the good sense to look ashamed.

"You're soaked," Donna said after a few long moments, eyeing the Doctor with concern.

"You're not wearing shoes," he countered, eyeing her barefeet curiously.

"Oh," she muttered, looking down at her feet in surprise, "yeah."

"Or a coat," he continued, stepping closer to her.

She shook her head, "Had to come out here and yell at you, didn't I?" she said, grinning at him, "Didn't know if I had the time to prepare properly."

"I," he paused, looking away from her, "I'm sorry, for leaving you, but it was safer then letting you and James come along," Donna knew he was probably lying. Knew his reasons for leaving them were probably more selfish then he wanted to admit, but she didn't care.

When he offered her the ride of her life she hesitated. She didn't trust him, he was a heart broken man that wanted to forget, but couldn't because of a baby that reminded him everyday. In the back of her mind she wondered if he was only asking because he didn't want to have to take care of his own son, but she still didn't care. Because the baby needed her, and she needed the baby. So she said yes, and ran inside for the possessions she and James absolutely couldn't leave without and said good bye to her mum, her dad, her granddad, and her same old boring life.

**DISCLAIMER: Go ahead, sue me, I don't have anything you'd want. hahaha bwahahahaha!**


	4. Chapter 4

**AUTHORS NOTE: SMITH AND JONES! Seen it for the first time to write this, and I've found I quite enjoy Martha, which was a surprise, because everyone always says how much they dislike her, but whatever. Review, pretty, pretty please?**

Donna had mostly tuned the Doctor out.

For possibly an hour, perhaps longer, the Doctor had been rambling about a signal or maybe an odd weather pattern, something about forks? Donna had been too busy playing peekaboo with James to pay too much attention. She sat on the floor with James on her lap, a thick blanket between her and the grating, an array of brightly colored toys surrounding them. Donna had been making vague sounds of agreement every time the Doctor had looked at her over his shoulder, from where he was tapping madly away at the control console. It was quite a nice little moment, Donna thought. Until the Doctor spun around on his heel, pointing at Donna with a smile on his face, "So, anyway, we'll take you to the hospital and get you all set up-"

"What?" Donna asked, looking up at the Doctor, interrupting him. Donna went through her mind trying to remember if she'd agreed to anything remotely similar to what he'd suggested, but realized she hadn't, "No," Donna said, shaking her head as she reached forward for the toy giraffe that James couldn't get enough of.

"Why?" the Doctor said, exasperated, as if he could not _possibly_ contemplate why she wouldn't do what he said.

Donna shrugged, "I don't want to," she said, holding the giraffe in front of James's eyes.

"But Donna," the Doctor said, pleadingly, "the _world_ could need saving."

"I doubt that severely, spaceman," she said, looking up at him with stubborn eyes. "If you're so curious, _you_ can go to the hospital."

The Doctor looked affronted, then angry, then he turned away from Donna pressing buttons on the controls and landing them bumpily outside the hospital.

"Doctor!" Donna shrieked, standing up quickly, "He has to be strapped in before you fly us anywhere!" she told him for the millionth time, gesturing angrily towards the car seat attached to the jumpseat.

"Hmm, sorry," the Doctor said, strutting over towards his coat and shrugging it on. "I'll be off then," he muttered, walking past her, down the ramp, and out the Tardis doors.

Donna turned and followed him out, James held securely in her amrs, she pushed open the hospitals glass doors. Just in time to see the Doctor let out a melodramatic cry of pain, grabbing his abdomen and falling onto the counter. Donna rolled her eyes, striding up next to the Doctor, rocking James as she leaned down to whisper in the Doctor's ear, "Such talent, ever try for a career in film?" she teased, smiling.

"Go back to the Tardis," he whispered a little harhsly, "I don't want to have to explain you."

Donna straightened up, hissing out an angry breath, walking out the doors withought a second glance.

She stood in front of the Hospital, looking at the Tardis, her lips puckered in thought, "We'll walk around a bit," she decided, shifting James to her other arm, "could go absolutely bonkers in that box." With a quick stop to the Tardis to pick up James's things they were off, Donna and baby walking happily down the street.

OOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOO

Next morning Donna stood in front of the jumpseat in the control room of the Tardis, James and her dressed and fed and ready for the day. She held in each of her hands a shoe, in her right was a trainer, in the other was a sturdy looking heel, Donna showed the shoes to James, dangling them in front of his face, wiggling them entertainingly, "What do you think, Jamie?" she asked him, leaning over his car seat to look him in the eyes, blue meeting blue.

He made a sort of grunting noise.

"Should have known you wouldn't be decisive," she grumbled, moving away from him and seemingly weighing the objects in her hands, "just like your father."

James made another grunting noise, Donna liked to imagine this one sounded indignant.

"Trainers will do, probably going to have to run at some point anyway," she said reasonably, pulling the trainers onto her feet, slipping them on without untying them first, "I'll have to carry you, no doubt," she told Jamie as she pulled his baby bag over her shoulder. "When will you learn to walk anyway?" she asked, picking him up and making her way out of the Tardis. She approached the Royal Hope, shielding James as best could from the rain pelting the hospital. She ran in through the double doors, shaking out her soaked hair, "Should have just taken a day trip around London with you, but no, I've got to come say hello to the spaceman in hospital, glutton for punishment me."

And then, not five minutes later Donna was thrown to the floor, desperately trying to protect James from being hurt and only succeeding in hurting herself more. She felt the side of her head hit the floor with a crunch. She groaned, laying on the floor, not wanting to move, ignoring James's squawks and trying not to black out, because she couldn't leave James alone like this. Eventually it was the screams that made her get up. They were so bloody annoying.

She sat up and dragged herself over to sit against the wall, placing herself just across from the glass doors of the hospital, James crying in her arms, the baby bag nowhere to be seen, "Please," she whispered, "can't stand you screaming like that."

James was not deterred.

Donna closed her eyes, running her hand through her hair, scowling when she looked at her hand and saw blood on it, "Brilliant," she mumbled, "I'm bleeding all over the place, aren't I?" she asked James.

The screams intensified. Donna looked up, and saw three massive alien ships land in front of the hospital, right in front of the glass doors. Her eyes widened as she looked out at the landscape for the first time, jaw dropping when she realized that the hospital was on the moon. "Oh, no," she murmered, standing up on wobbly legs. She swallowed, trying desperately to remember what the Doctor had told her about this hospital. Why had it been stolen? Were those aliens to blame? What did they want? "_Shit_," she hissed, leaning heavily agaisnt the wall as left the lobby as fast as she could.

OOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOO

It was a bit funny that Donna ended up in pediatrics.

At least Donna thought so, or was that the head wound talking?

Donna had pelted up the stairs, two at a time, until she just couldn't run anymore and decided that the floor she was on was just as safe as the one above it. She'd shoved her way in through a warped door and found herself surrounded by nurses and children, all looking up in fright. She'd slammed the door shut behind her and promply sat down under the window, James crying in her lap, her head bleeding. A lovely blonde nurse had appraoched, peering at the head wound, only to be shooed away by Donna, "I'm alright," Donna told her, smiling a smile that didn't reach her eyes.

She closed her eyes, only for a moment she promised, but when she opened them she saw the lovely nurse in front of her, attaching a tiny little child sized oxygen mask over James's face, it would have been cute if it wasn't so sad. "You're son's barely big enough for the mask," the nurse told her softly. Donna let out a hum of protest, too weak to actually get the words 'he's not mine' out of her mouth, and that's when Donna noticed how thin the air was, how quiet it was, she couldn't even think properly.

Donna looked up to see a young man thrashing about weakly, being held back by one burly female nurse and one male nurse, he was fighting for the oxygen tank attached to James. "No use, no use," the man said, "kid won't survive without his mum anyway," he said, gesturing at Donna meekly. She looked at the nurse, a question in her eyes.

The bright young nurse, smiled at her, collapsing down on the ground in front of her, but still awake, "We decided the baby should live," she whispered, she smiled dreamily, "because babies smell so nice," she finished as her big brown eyes closed slowly.

Donna swallowed, her muddled mind trying to digest everything, but then she couldn't fill her lungs anymore, and it was far more pleasent to just close her eyes.

OOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOO

Sunlight streamed in through the window above Donna's head, it took a moment for Donna to register this though.

When she did she smiled, she tore the mask off James's face, noting joyfully that his eyes were open and he seemed perfectly fine, and climbed to her feet, nudging the young nurse with her foot, rousing her, before walking/limping out of the ward. She clung to the hand rails the entire way down the stairs, ignoring offers of help and assistance, sure that if she lost focus for one moment she and James would go plummeting down the stairs. She finally made it to the ground floor, she had to evade several emergency medical people, but she finally found herself outside.

She took deep breaths as she walked from the hospital to the Tardis, lurching forward, because the short walk had drained her of any energy she'd ever possessed. She fell against the Tardis door, holding herself up long enough to tug on the handle, only to find it locked. She let out a choked sob as she fell the short way to the pavement, banging her hand desperately against the blue panels, cursing the Doctor because he never gave her a key.

It took only a few seconds for the door to be pulled open, the Doctor's scrunchy face (the one he wore when he was thinking or angry or worried or hungry) leaning forwards, his frown deepening when he saw Donna slumped against his ship. "Oh, Donna, hold James tightly," he sighed, bending down and picking her up like she weighed nothing, which did wonders for Donna's ego, but probably did nothing for the Doctor's back. He carried her up the ramp, into the control room, through the other door, into the hallway, finally setting her and James down in a room she'd never seen before. A room with white panels and shiny silver machines and a sonogram machine in the corner. Donna lost conciousness relatively sure that he was going to help her with her head.

She woke up later and found out that the Doctor had invited a sweet young girl named Martha along for the ride.

A ride she didn't know Donna and James were already on.

**DISCLAIMER: Don't own anything, seriously, I live in a old cardboard box, with a man named Patrick and a rat we call Renee.**


	5. Chapter 5

**AUTHORS NOTE: Sorry for speaking in bold, but COME ON and REVIEW! PLEASE! Must I use italics as well? _PLEASE_ _REVIEW!_**

Donna had been waiting for over three hours when she'd finally decided she'd had enough.

She'd woken up in the room she'd dubbed 'the medical bay' completely alone, her head wound healed. She'd wandered through the Tardis halls, finding James in his nursery, crying, she picked him up and his cries instantly turned into little sniffles. Donna liked to think that, while the Tardis could technically care for James as well as she could, James wanted only her. She spent an hour looking for the spaceman, finding nothing. She spent the next two hours debating with herself whether she should open the doors or not.

The Doctor was out there, she knew, but she'd developed a sort of aversion to setting foot outside the Tardis.

Donna would never admit it out loud, but she was terrified that one day the Doctor would come home and not notice that she and James weren't next to him. Terrified that he would think of some grand new adventure and not wait for her to come back, stranding her on some alien world with a child to take care of. Terrified that he had changed his mind and didn't really want her or James at all and would leave them next chance he got.

She pushed those fears aside though, she dressed herself and James in new clean clothes, made a new baby bag, and opened the Tardis doors slowly, holding her breath.

"Earth," she said, looking out at the wooden slum right outside the doors, she looked down towards James, "right?" she asked him.

He squeaked.

"Sweetheart," Donna told him, stepping out of the Tardis and onto the street carefully, "this looks old," Donna swallowed thickly, "all right, the past then, okay." She set off down the street, moving around a gross looking puddle, her eyes roving all around her, hypnotized. These people were dead, dead and gone, but here she was walking among them, talking to them, seeing them living their lives. It was all amazing, but also terribly tragic.

"-and the Earth will be consumed by flames," a man dressed in black cried out, right beside Donna, making her flinch back in surprise. She looked at him blankly, recalling how the last time she'd smiled sympathetically at a crazy man she'd almost been stabbed. Not fun.

But he stepped up to her, blocking her path, pointing at her, "_You_ will be consumed," he called, "the terrible flames come for you!" Donna backed away, shaking her head as she tried to retreat back to the Tardis. The man flung himself forward, reaching out for her, she tried to scramble back, but got her heel caught in a loose cobblestone, which sent her backside crashing to the ground.

People started gathering around them, making Donna feel nervous, which made her angry. She stood up, she shoved the man aside with her shoulder, trying to walk past him, the old man grabbed her right arm, yanking her back roughly, Donna could hear the arm of her blouse tearing, he pulled her forwards until their noses almost touched. "In the midst of the inevitable darkness you will burn," he whispered, making Donna gag as his rancid breath blew across her face, "burn brighter then any star." He looked down at James, smiling sadly, "And your son will burn with you."

Donna pushed him away, kicking at him wildly until he let go, then she turned and jogged down the street.

When Donna felt another hand grab her arm she whirled around, thinking it may be that mad old man, and kicked out without thinking, kicking whoever it was in the shin. She gasped almost inaudibly when she saw it wasn't the old man at all, it was a relatively young man with a beard, who was now jumping on one foot and looking at her in confusion. "Red Lady," he said kindly, "was a shock I'm sure, but is such violence required?"

"I'm sorry," Donna stuttered, looking behind her, seeing no old man. "I thought you were someone else," she explained, turning back to the man.

The man was looking at her in concern.

Donna finally felt the tears on her cheeks, heard the way her voice was shaking, she cursed herself angrily, swiping away her tears, while clutching James, who she suddenly noticed was crying quite loudly. The man held up his hands, a non-threatening gesture that Donna recognized, "What has scared you so?" he asked, looking behind her suspiciously.

"Nothing," Donna snapped, "I'm not frightened."

"You were attacked," the man said, eyeing her torn blouse.

"No," she denied vehemently, rocking James in her arms, trying not to show how much her arm hurt from where the old man had grabbed her. The man's eyes narrowed, scrutinizing Donna's arm. _Damn_, Donna thought.

"I'm Colin," the man said.

"Donna," she said, she showed James's face to Colin, "This is James."

"You've a handsome son," Colin chuckled, coming closer to Donna, but stilling when she pulled James to her chest again, her entire body stiffening.

"He's not my son," Donna told him.

"Ah, younger brother then?" Colin asked, smiling flirtatiously at Donna, pulling a reluctant grin from Donna's lips.

OOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOO

Colin was quite drunk when he asked Donna to marry him, so Donna didn't think it really fair to take him seriously.

He'd talked Donna into coming to his mother's house, for dinner he said.

'Dinner' apparently meaning a party of huge proportions where food was present.

Colin had led her into a large house, explaining that it had come so cheap because it was so close to the crazy house, shoving men who looked remarkably similair to him, dark hair, dark eyes, same chins, out of the way and presenting Donna to an older woman with pure white hair and almost black eyes. "Who are these bright creatures?" the woman had asked, raising her hands and gesturing towards Donna and James's red hair with a grin.

"I'm Donna," Donna told her, stepping closer to her, instantly feeling safe in this womans presence. "This is James," she said, smiling proudly when the woman clucked in approval and leaned down to look in James's eyes.

"He's a strong one," the old woman said, looking up at Donna, "Call me Sarah." Sarah turned, heading deeper into the house, motioning for Donna to follow her, which she did without hesitation. She was led her into a comfortable sitting room filled with woman of all ages, and one very friendly man who told her yellow wasn't her color.

Hours passed, it was dark outside, and it seemed everyone else had either left of passed out, leaving Donna, Sarah, and Colin (who shouldn't have counted because he was so pissed) alone in the silent house.

Sarah looked at Donna with steady eyes, "Donna," she said, "Who are you? You don't speak like you should, your clothes are so odd, and you didn't even know the year," Donna knew her eyes had widened, she tried to cover, looking down at the floor, only to feel Sarah's small hand raising her chin, "None of that," Sarah chastised.

Donna took a deep breath, "I'm no one, nothing."

"Not nothing," Sarah told her, shaking her head, "you're this ones mother," she said, stroking a hand over James's hair fondly.

Donna shook her head, "No, no, I'm not. I'm not his mother."

Sarah kneeled down on the floor in front of Donna, one hand cupped over James's head, "You love him?" Donna nodded. "You feed him?" Donna nodded. "You come running in the middle of the night when he's screaming?" Donna nodded. "Seems you're his mother to me," Sarah said.

"It's not so simple, though," Donna said thickly.

"Why?"

"Because this man, the Doctor, Jamie's father-"

Sarah cut her off with a raised hand, "Where is this Doctor?"

Donna shrugged, "He ran off, that's why I'm here, I'm looking for him."

Sarah actually looked surprised, "He left you? You and James?"

Donna nodded.

Sarah sighed sadly, "No true father would leave his son behind."

Donna shook her head, "If anything I'm Jamie's nursemaid, that's hardly-"

Colin bumped into the couch, kneeling down to hug Donna around the middle, "Donna," he slurred, "If you were my wife I'd never leave you!"

Donna smiled, "I'm no one's wife, not planning on it right now either-"

"And if James were my son I'd teach him all the tricks of my trade!" he wailed.

"Wonderful," Donna said, rolling her eyes, and silently motiong for Sarah to take care of her son.

"Marry me! Donna, be my wife, and we'll raise James as our son!"

Sarah began to laugh.

"Colin," Donna huffed, pushing him back, he lost his balance and landed with a smack on his behind, a confused look on his drunk face.

"I know you're a little older," Colin said, rubbing the back of his neck, "But I don't care how old you are! You can still bear many sons!"

Donna was starting to get insulted now.

"And they'll have your bright hair and by dark eyes, they'll have my intellect and your fiery spirit. They'd be strong warriors!"

Donna shook her head, smacking her palm against her forehead wearily.

**DISCLAIMER: If they were mine, to do with as I please, well...I don't quite know what I would do with them. Hmmm, have to think that one over....**


	6. Chapter 6

**AUTHORS NOTE: Hola! You're all very nice and I wanna thank you for reading my story! ENJOY!**

It was not the first time a man had forcibly slept with her....

Not like _that_!

(Not this time.)

Colin had passed out cold at some point in the night after Sarah had gone to bed, tipping precariously before finally falling forward and pinning Donna to the couch, Donna had tried waking him up (hitting him, hissing insults in his ear, and whatnot), but ultimately to no avail. When that didn't work Donna tried wiggling out from under him, finding out in the worst way that he was a much taller and sturdier man then she'd originally given him credit for, she must have spent twenty minutes futilely attempting to push him away before finally giving up with an angry sigh. Donna was too mortified to yell for help, afraid that Sarah, with all her morals, would walk into the living room and accuse Donna of being a harlot (or some other old timey word) and throw her and James into the street screaming at her.

So Donna just....laid there, praying that Sarah wouldn't come down, praying that James wouldn't wake up and need her, praying that the sleeping drunks on the floor would remain asleep.

And still it got worse, because Donna couldn't fall asleep, everytime she'd close her eyes she would think she heard the stairs creaking, which would snap her violently back into wakefullness. It did give her time to think at least, that was something wasn't it?

She turned her head as much as she could, cringing when she felt Colin's hot breath against her neck, she looked at James, sleeping peacefully, wrapped in a cocoon of warm blankets by the window, in an old crib that Sarah had salvaged from the attic. Donna began to count in her head, adding up the number of days (according to her personal time line) that she'd known the Doctor, which was invariably the same number of days that she'd been caring for James. But then she got confused because time inside the Tardis wasn't always so easy to count. She eventually arrived at the number five.

Five.

Donna shook her head in wonder. She'd been taking care of James for only five days, yet she loved him like she'd known him his entire life, which, to be fair, was no more then three months, but still.

Then there was the Doctor. A broken man, Donna knew, even if he would not admit it. He'd loved and lost. He was the man that never stopped running, Donna thought, a man that didn't forget per se, but certainly didn't actively remember. Donna wondered if that made sense. Oh, well, it made sense in her head. Yet it felt like she'd known him much longer as well. Donna wasn't sure what to make of their relationship, they were friendly, polite, but also somewhat aloof, like a divorced married couple that only ever saw each other at their sons football games and had to make small talk. Donna wasn't sure if she liked that.

Donna was honest with herself, she knew it was because of James, poor James, the Doctor's son. The Doctor was awkward around James, fumbling about with his toys and nappies and bottles, almost like he'd never had to deal with these things before, or if he had, he'd forgotten. The Doctor never held James either. Multiple times Donna had attempted to pass James to the Doctor, only to have the Doctor back away, flinching back in shocked sadness when he would peer at James's face. Donna got defensive at those times, holding James tighlty to her chest as the Doctor shook his head with a stammered excuse as to why he couldn't hold the baby. There was absolutely nothing wrong with James. He was perfect. And somehow the Doctor couldn't see it and that made Donna hold James just a little tighter and talk to him a little more.

It had to do with the Doctor's lost girl, Rose, James's mother. It made Donna feel inadequate sometimes, when the Doctor would come bounding into a room, a large smile on his face, only to dim when he saw Donna, instead of Rose, standing with James. Donna knew that the Doctor would trade her for Rose in a heartbeat, and that made her sadder then words.

Donna gritted her teeth in humiliation when Colin started to press closer to her, grinding his lower half into her thigh. It really wasn't fair, Donna felt, Colin had been so sweet earlier in the day. But right now wasn't his fault, she told herself, a drunk does what a drunk does and that's that. _He's not even awake right now_, she thought, a solitary tear slipping out of her eye and rolling down her cheek.

OOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOO

Donna had left that house as soon as possible, as soon as Colin rolled over, snorting as he rolled onto his back, finally freeing Donna from underneath him, she grabbed James, making sure to unwrap all the blankets that didn't belong to him, leaving only his favorite red one. She grabbed everything of theirs, not wanting to mess up timelines by leaving formula mix in the past or anything like that, and walked out the door, shutting it as quietly as she could on her way out. Donna did not feel quilty for walking away without a good bye. She had entered these peoples lives, and now she would exit them. Quick, clean, no having to see Colin's sweet face ever again, she decided she would remember him only as sweet. No use remembering that bit on the couch, no use at all.

OOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOO

Donna literally stumbled into the the mad old man from yesterday that morning. She'd been walking for hours, she'd gotten completely lost after leaving Colin's house, she'd been searching for the Tardis since then, her fingers slowly growing numb in the cold. "Little Red!" he'd called, sounding so heart breakingly sad that Donna, against her better judgement, had stopped to look at him.

She swallowed nervously as he approached her, stopping only a couple of feet away, he stared at her incredulously, like he couldn't believe she stood in front of him, "What do you want?" Donna snapped.

"I did not know," he said, shaking his head sadly, looking at her with those tragic eyes. "I saw only the begining, and it scared me beyond reason."

"What do you mean?" Donna asked, a surreal quality suddenly surrounding her.

"I saw only the flames," he said, his voice adopting a far away vagueness, his eyes studying her face, "those terrible flames. But not the choice."

Donna was starting to think perhaps the man was drunk. Or had he been drunk yesterday? Or was he insane all the time, but only sometimes violent? "Yeah, alright mate," she said, stepping around him, careful not to let him snag her arm again.

But he didn't try to grab her, only looked at her, "Donna Noble," he said, making Donna turn around, because she hadn't told _anyone_ her last name in this time period. "Oh, Donna Noble, Little Red Riding Hood, the big Bad Wolf is coming," he intoned, like he was preaching from a pulpit. "The Bad Wolf and Red Riding hood, but who will the hunter save this time?"

Donna stared after him as he ambled off, weaving off down the street in a drunken fashion, leaving a terribly shaken Donna behind, cluthing the sleeping James tightly.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo

When noon time came, Donna had still not found the Tardis, and felt right stupid about it. She berated herself under her breath, calling herself terrible names, as her eyes still searched for the blue box. Donna hoped it was her own stupidity, or ineptness, or _something_, that was making her fail to locate the Tardis. Because the other option was that she couldn't find the Tardis because the Tardis was gone, the Doctor had returned, and (thinking she was still in the medical bay) had piloted the ship away, none the wiser. _In that case_, Donna thought, _I might do well to go find Colin and marry him after all._

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOo

Donna hadn't eaten all day, so she thought she might be hallucinating.

So she blinked to clear her head.

Then again.

Finally she admitted to herself that she had most definately seen a pretty young woman come floating out of a second story window. Only to rocket away a second later, cackling madly, some sort of voodoo puppet in her hand.

Donna thought it wise to go investigate, seeing as where there were floating woman there might be a Doctor about.

She met him on the stairs. He almost knocked her over as he sprinted down, taking steps two at a time and not bothering to look ahead. He looked up just in time, stopping his mad dash, flinging his arms out wildly to clutch the banister. He made a sort of grunting noise, not unlike the noises James made, when a young woman in a well fitting red jacket crashed into his back, having not stopped herself in time. Donna looked the woman over, immediately realizing that this young woman was from Donna's own time period, or near enough at any rate.

Donna looked to the Doctor, noting in satisfaction that he wore a guilty expression. She raised her hand when he opened his mouth, "No," Donna said, shaking her head, "I've had a long day, alright, so we'll deal with this pretty thing," she said, gesturing at Martha, "when we get home. But for right now, I just want to know, was that a witch I just saw?"

The Doctor grinned at her, nodding.

Donna felt herself grinning too.

**DISCLAIMER: Nah, it's not mine.**


	7. Chapter 7

**AUTHORS NOTE: Because I want to, that's why! HAHAH BWHAAHAHAHH!**

Luckily for the Doctor, Donna's anger (which had festered to a ridiculous degree throughout her terrible day in the past) had subsided a little by the time they defeated the Carronites and got back to the Tardis. Meeting William Shakespeare didn't hurt anything either, especially because he was far better looking then she'd imagined in school. But she was Donna Noble, and she did _not_ forgive easily.

So when the Doctor sauntered over to the control console of the Tards, his big brown eyes locked onto Martha (who had the common sense to look uncomfortable), seemingly ignoring Donna and the baby, something _snapped_ in Donna. She'd always been known for her temper, ever since she set fire to the neighbor boys bike in second grade, after he'd made one too many ginger remarks, _so_, short of setting fire to the Tardis, Donna did what Donna had always done best. She _screamed_.

"You _stupid_ Martian!" she screamed, pushing the Doctor in the back.

The Doctor whirled around, a confused and slightly hurt look on his face, "What?" he asked, his voice grating on Donna's sensitive nerves.

She pointed at him, her finger hovering just in front of his nose, "_What_?" Donna mimicked, mocking the Doctor, "You left us! Me alone in the medical bay, and poor James screaming in his crib!"

The Doctor backed away from her, his hands raised, "The Tardis can-"

"Your _ship_, however brilliant she is, is not the same as a person! The Tardis can't pick James up, the Tardis can't hold him, the Tardis is only a bloody ship!" Donna stomped over to the carseat, placing James (who was so used to Donna screaming didn't look troubled at all) gently down. She turned on her heel, staring at the Doctor with icy blue eyes, "How can you be so irresponsible!"

The Doctor looked at Martha imploringly, she shook her head meekly, the Doctor turned his puppy dog eyes on, Martha caved, turning to Donna, raising a calming hand. "The Doctor," Martha said, ignoring Donna's sharp glare, "shouldn't be held responsible for _your_ son," she said reasonably.

Donna looked at Martha like she was insane. "You are kidding me," she murmered quietly, rubbing a weary hand over her eyes as she turned away from Martha and the Doctor.

The Doctor looked incredibly awkward, looking down at the floor, evading Martha's suddenly unsure gaze. Martha looked between the two, eyes landing on James, studying him, "He is yours? Isn't he, Donna? Just look at him, he's yours," Martha said, stepping nervously from foot to foot. Her eyes widened suddenly, looking betwen Donna and the Doctor in shock, "Oh my god," she murmered, "he's both of yours!"

Donna turned at that, a miserable laugh escaping her lips, "Don't make me laugh!" she huffed, she looked at the Doctor, disgust written across her face, "Tell her, Doctor. Why don't you tell the whole truth this once."

"He's, um, well Martha," the Doctor said, looking up sheepishly, "James is my son, not Donna's at all, she just, well, she sort of takes better care of him then I ever could, and he simply adores her," the Doctor rambled. Martha seemed to be in a daze, looking at the Doctor, betrayal in her eyes.

"But," she said, interupting him, "you said you didn't have anyone," she almsot whispered.

The Doctor shrugged.

"You told me," she said, her voice rising, "that you were alone!"

Donna rolled her eyes, gesturing around at the various baby toys on the floor and the carseat, "You're either blind or stupid!" she hissed, "You didn't notice all this?"

Martha looked around, her eyes landing on the carseat, her cheeks flushing in her embarassment, then her eyes landed on a purple sweater over the railing, Donna's sweater, hanging just where Donna had found Rose's shirt. She swallowed, "I don't know," she looked at Donna, her eyes almost pleading, "He swept me ot of my life and it was all so amazing, I didn't think," she told Donna quietly.

Donna wasn't angry with Martha, because she knew what Martha meant. Donna took a deep breath, glaring at the Doctor, "Yeah," she said, inclining her head irritably, "no harm done," she hissed.

The Doctor, either ignoring Donna's blatantly obvious scorn or simply not noticing it, walked towards the console, smiling that carefree grin.

He turned to Martha, "Just one trip, is what I said, one trip in the Tardis, then home. But I suppose...we could-"

"Oh just get on with it, you twat!" Donna spat, she turned to Martha, leading her over to the jumpseat and sitting her down next to James's carseat, "He wants to take you somewhere else," she said, rolling her eyes.

The Doctor looked at Donna, annoyance glinting in his eyes, "How about another planet?" he asked, his eyes going back to Martha.

She looked excited, twisting her back to see him better, "Can we go to yours?" she asked.

Donna shook her head, "No, Martha," she said.

Martha looked at her curiously, "Why not?"

Donna looked at the Doctor out of the corner of her eyes, noting how his face had fallen, "It burned," Donna answered simply, shrugging, because she honestly didn't know more then that.

Martha looked at her with curious eyes, studying her, "Are you human?" she asked.

"Yes," Donna assured her, smiling despite herself.

The Tardis landed roughly, almost knocking Martha off her seat and making Donna lunge forward to grab the control console. Donna and Martha looked over at the Doctor, who was again smiling like a lunatic, pulling on his coat. "New Earth," he said, smiling as he pulled open the doors.

This was Donna's first alien planet, she was understandably excited about it. She pulled her purple sweater off the railing, putting it on quickly, then grabbed the baby and his bag, she was by the door in less then two minutes. "Ready!" she called, smiling at the Doctor, her anger fading away as the prospect of a new adventure entered her mind. The Doctor looked at her, his eyebrow raised, probably not knowing what to make of her somewhat wild mood swings. Martha joined her by the door, smiling.

OOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOO

While Martha and the Doctor were obviously a little disgusted with the trafficking of moods, Donna found it all quite interesting. She found herself wondering how they were made, how many moods were available, which ones were most popular, and whether or not they were addictive. The Doctor and Martha looked at her strangely when she voiced her questions. They were distracted when a girl, maybe twenty, dressed in such bleak clothing that it broke Donna's heart, came out of a side alley, walking up to one of the mood booths.

"I want to buy forget," the young woman said, in a depressingly morose voice.

The woman behind the counter smiled, "I've got forget, me darling. What strand? How much you want forgetting?"

Donna started walking over, listening to their conversation, not noticing the Doctor's eyes on her back, watching her closely.

"It's my mother and father, they went on the motorway," the girl said, wrapping her shawl closer around her blonde head.

Donna strode next to the girl, looking at the mood seller, "Is it that powerful?" she asked.

The mood seller smiled at her, being able to tell immediately that Donna was a prospective customer, "Depends on the strand, my love," the seller said. "What this darling will need is this," she said, handing the young woman a patch, the word 'forget' written in blue on its clear surface. "That's two credits," she said as the young woman handed her the coins.

Donna licked her lips, finally noticing the Doctor's scrutiny, but going ahead anyway, "How far can it go back?" Donna asked.

"A fair number of years," the seller told her, looking at her in sympathy, somehow understanding what Donna didn't want to say outloud.

"Does it erase the thing completely, or change it, or make you not care, not think about it anymore?" Donna asked, her eyes narrowing in intensity. Donna felt the Doctor place his hand on her shoulder, squeezing her just slightly, but she ignored him, "Does it matter if you have scars?" she asked.

The Doctor's hand tightened on her shoulder involuntarily, the mood seller looked at Donna sadly, "You won't remember why the scars are there."

"Donna," the Doctor whispered gently, placing his lips close to her ear, "come on," he urged, trying to pull her back gently.

She shook him off, "If you have more then one thing you want to forget?" Donna asked, "Do you have to wear more then one patch?"

Martha looked at Donna sadly, "This is the future of the human race," Martha said bitterly, "off their heads on chemicals."

Donna huffed, eyeing Martha wearily, "Not much different from our time," she reminded Martha harhsly. Then she screamed because a man and a woman grabbed her from behind, pointing guns at Martha and the Doctor.

"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry, we just need three," the man said, pointing his gun at Donna's head now, "I'm sorry!" He pulled Donna backwards, nearly knocking her off her feet, she held onto James, fearful that she'd drop him right on his cute little ginger head.

"Let her go!" the Doctor screamed, following after them, his big brown eyes looking at Donna, "I'm warning you, let her go!" he yelled, pointing at the man and woman, looking far more threatening then Donna had seen him before. "Whatever it is, I can help, just let her go!"

Donna would have rolled her eyes if she hadn't been so terrified. Donna was dragged through a doorway, the metal door slamming with a terrible clang after her. Leaving the Doctor on the other side.

OOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOO

Things were fuzzy, fuzzier then they had any right to be, Donna thought. She groaned, trying to remember what the hell she'd smoked the night before, or how much she'd drunk.

Then she remembered, she looked up quickly, scanning the tiny space she was in, blinking away the last of the fuzziness. James was asleep by her chest, the two people that had kidnapped her were sitting, talking about _apple grass_ or some such thing. Donna saw a gun resting by her head, she picked it up, noting immediately that the weight felt off, that there was no safety, and definately no bullets, _it wasn't a real bloody gun_. Donna jumped to her feet, leaving James to sleep on the bed, and hit the man in the back of the head with the toy gun, smiling when he screamed in pain.

"You bastard!" she screamed, throwing the gun away and hitting him with her fists.

"Stop it!" the girl screeched, her hands covering her mouth.

Donna did stop, she looked at the two of them, a murderous glint in her eyes, "Take me back," she hissed, "take me back right now."

The girl was sobbing, which should have made Donna felt bad, but made her strangely glad, "We can't," the girl cried.

"Why?!"

"We need three for the fast lane," the girl sobbed, leaning over to check on the man.

"I don't bloody care!" Donna screeched.

"No, you don't understand," the girl said, "We need three to get to Brooklyn, the air is so clean there, don't you want your son to breath clean air? That's all we want, we want our son to breathe clean air!"

Donna looked around for a child, seeing only James, she looked back at the girl, her upper lip rising angrily, "Let me guess, you're pregnant?" she asked.

The girl nodded.

Donna cursed in a variety of languages, gesturing emphatically, and glaring at the couple before her.

**DISCLAIMER: Nay, it's not mine.**


	8. Chapter 8

**AUTHORS NOTE: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

Donna didn't care anymore. She didn't _care_. She wanted to go home.

She hated these people.

She hated these cars.

She hated the fog and the weird noises.

She wanted to take James and go to her mothers house, sit at her fathers table and laugh with her grandfather.

"What's that mean then?" Donna screeched, pointing down at the little computer screen, "We can't get to Brooklyn?"

The pregnant girl, Donna didn't know her name, seemed a to get a bit paniclky, she waved her hands about, "Try the next one!"

The man, pregnant girls baby daddy, pressed the screen, "Brooklyn turn off two closed," the computer voice said.

Donna raised her hands and had to hold back a satisfied smirk when the pregnant girls baby daddy flinched, then she decided that 'pregnant girls baby daddy' was way too long a thing to call somebody and began thinking of him simply as 'the idiot'. "Alright," Donna said, "that's that then, turn us around."

The idiot turned in his seat, looking at Donna incredulously, "No, we'll keep going around, we'll do the whole loop and by the time we get back it'll be open."

Donna huffed, "What if it's not?" she asked, red hair flying as she shook her head in irritation.

The idiots answer was drowned out by a terrible noise as the car shook terribly, nearly making Donna fall to the floor, she ran back towards the bed and held James down, making sure he wouldn't roll off. She looked over her shoulder at the pregnant girl and the idiot, "And if that's air vents I'll eat my own hair, idiot!" she screamed.

Donna's bad mood must have spread outward, because the man turned in his seat, stood up, and advanced on Donna, "What else could it be?" he screamed.

"It could be a monster!" Donna screamed back, glaring daggers at the idiot as James began to cry, finally being woken up by the strange noises and raised voices. The car shook again, more forcibly, and Donna lifted James up, holding him securely in the protective embrace of her arms, his little red head tucked under her chin. Donna reached out and hit the idiot with her open palm, "You bastard! Kidnapped us and now we're going to die!"

The idiot was starting to look very, very angry, he grabbed Donna's wrist, squeezing it painfully, "It's not a monster, it's just the air vents!"

Donna tried to tug her arm away, only succeeding in making it hurt more, "Stop lying to yourself!" she screeched, "The motor way is all a bloody lie! Has anyone ever made it out?! Anyone?!"

The pregnant girl began to cry, distracting the idiot long enough for Donna to wrench her wrist free, flexing her fingers and grimacing. The idiot, after calming his girlfriend down, turned to Donna. He looked furious, "Don't upset her," he said quietly, "those noises are just the air vents." Donna shook her head stubbornly, began to speak but stopped when the idiot took a threatening step forward. "I promised her fresh air," he said, "that's what she'll get. There are no monsters."

"The motor way is a death trap," Donna said.

The idiots face twisted into a scowl of hatred and fear and anger as he reached forward with both hands, grabbing Donna by the upper arms and shaking her violently, screaming at her over his girlfriends sobs. Donna wrapped her arms around James, trying to keep his neck and head relatively stable, "Stop it!" she begged, "The baby, you'll hurt the baby!" she screamed.

The idiot swung back a closed fist before hitting Donna straight in the face, pulling back and hitting her again. Donna had one second to think about how unfair the last few days had been and about how badly her face hurt before she crumpled to the floor, the pull of gravity far to strong for her to fight off.

James pitiful wails were the last thing she heard before she blacked out.

OOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOO

Donna woke up in darkness, the acrid smell of exhaust fumes thick in her nostrils. She coughed, tried to to sit up and failed, she reached up to where her nose was most likely to be, and felt wetness on her fingers. Damn, she thought, realizing that her nose was broken. She let her fingers drift down, prodding the rest of her face, gasping in pain when she reached her jaw, damn, she thought, realizing that she'd broken her jaw. She sighed, hissing the breath through her teeth, totally unwilling to let her jaw move even a tiny bit.

And, now that she thought about it, the rest of her was pretty banged up too. Which was odd, considering that the idiot had only hit her in the face.

Her mind was very fuzzy, but through her haze she heard James crying. She slumped up onto her elbows, squinting into the fog, _where the hell is the car_, she wondered as she crawled forwards, going incredibly slowly, having to stop every few moments to catch her breath. Her left hand skimmed the ground, it felt like concrete with layers of dirt over it, trying to feel either James's soft skin or his wool blanket, because she didn't trust her eyes in the darkness.

After what felt like hours, Donna's hand brushed against something that was definately skin, but her hand recoiled as soon as she registered how cold it was. Recovering from her shock, Donna touched it again, feeling it, and after running her fingers over its long hair she began to cry, hot, angry, and frightened tears as she realized that this was the body of the pregnant girl. "Oh my god," she stuttered, crawling backwards away from the body too quickly for her damaged body, making herself throw up all over herself, wich made her cry even more.

Donna berated herself harshly, looking at the pregnant girl again, brushing away her tears with the back of her hand, seeing, through the fog, the outline of the car behind the girl. It lay wrecked and ruined on its side not four feet away. That's where James cries were coming from.

She crawled forward, taking great pains to go around the pregnant girls body, until she was right beside the car. She wiggled in through the broken windshield, noting happily that the fog was less thick inside the car. She would have smiled, if it hadn't been for her broken jaw, when she found James, wrapped tightly in his red wool blanket crying his little eyes out. Because, even if he was crying, it meant that his lungs were just fine and he was alive.

Donna grabbed James, holding him tightly against her as she curled up on the floor, too tired and broken to do anything above cooeing soothing sounds into his ear. The car had obviously crashed, why or how, Donna didn't know, the pregnant girl was dead, the idiot probably was too, and her and James were a thousand feet down at the bottem of a fog filled tunnel that didn't seem to lead anywhere. _Wizard_.

**DISCLAIMER: Pretty, prettly please? I promise to feed them, and play with them, and take care of them all the time. Can't I keep them, please?**


	9. Chapter 9

**AUTHORS NOTE: FACE OF BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

_Wake up, Red, wake up._

Donna groaned, opening her swollen eyes as much as she could, looking out accusatorily at the interior of the broken car. _I am awake_, she thought irritably, not clearly registering that there was no one in the car with her and, even if there were, that they wouldn't be able to hear her thoughts.

_Please wake up, Red, I need you to keep your eyes open._

Donna blinked, trying to rouse herself and only partially succeeding as she became aware of James laying limply on the crook of her arm, _Oh my god_, Donna thought, tears forming in her eyes. She rolled over onto her side, ignoring the terrible pain all over her body, curling her body around the baby, laying a gentle hand over his little chest, her breath hitching in her throat as her eyes swept over James's dirty face.

_Shh, it's alright, Red, he's okay. _

_Bloody bodiless voice!_ Donna seethed, registering that the voice in her head was either a figmant of her imagination or some sort of weird telepathic alien. _Alright? He's not breathing! He's not breathing, oh my god, he's dead, no, no. _Donna's hand began to shake, tears streaming down her face when James's little head lolled to the side. _No, no, no, no._

_Donna, listen to me, he's gone into a hibernating sleep, his vitals are so slow he only looks dead, did you hear me? He's fine._

Donna wanted to believe so badly, but honestly, what sort of woman would she be if she just started to listen to the voices in her head? _He's dead and I've gone mad_, she thought darkly, _again_.

_You're not crazy._

Donna breathed an amused huff through her tears, she thought she heard a bit of reproach in the voices tone, a tiny mild bit, overshadowed by concern, it sounded just like something her grandfather would say. Donna gasped as she felt James's little chest rise under her hand, so the voice was right, he was alive.

_Of course I'm right, I always am._

_Alright, don't get carried away,_ Donna thought, laying her head back down on the ground, her heavy eyelids drooping slightly_, now, who the hell are you?_

_You're still as fiesty as ever._

Donna's forehead creased in irritation, was the voice flirting with her? That can't be, surely? _That doesn't_ _sound like a name to me, _she thought, her eyes dropping completely closed.

_Call me Boe._

Donna didn't think anything back, she was just so tired, and the darkness was just so inviting, and she was so very warm and comfortable.

_Donna, you don't have to worry, the Doctor is coming._

Donna smiled faintly at that.

_But I'll be gone soon._

Donna frowned slightly.

_I need you to know that I loved you, even after what happened. Even after what he made you do._

Donna fell deeper into darkness, the voice now a tiny whisper in the back of her mind.

_Please remember, it wasn't your fault. You never did believe me, but I need to tell you one last time, I never blamed you for what happened. I love you._

Donna's muddled mind was completely confused.

_Good bye, Red._

**DISCLAIMER: I can't think of anything witty right now, come back later. Oh, yeah, I don't own them.**


	10. Chapter 10

**AUTHORS NOTE: FACE OF BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

"Donna, hold James tight."

Donna knew that voice, that was the Doctor's voice, she tried to respond, but only managed to make a sort of pained moan, which turned into muffled screech of pain when she felt the Doctor's arms lift her from the floor. Donna opened her eyes as much as could, which wasn't much, and looked up at the Doctor's face, he had his determined face on, the one he wore when he wanted to save the world.

"Just hang on."

Donna swallowed, blinking her tear filled eyes as clutched James against her chest, awake enough to realize that dropping the infant would be terrible.

The Doctor glanced down at her, his arms tightening around her, which made her gasp and cry out pitifully. Something dark and sad came into his eyes then, but he looked too angry to cry. "I'm sorry," he said, looking back up as he stepped over the broken glass of the windshield, stepping out into the fog filled tunnel, "I'm sorry, Donna. But I need to carry you, both your legs are broken."

Donna whimpered, closed her eyes and turned her face towards the Doctor's chest, the blue material of his jacket acting perfectly well as a tissue for her tears.

"I tried to get to you," the Doctor said, "I cleared the motor way, but you didn't come up with the rest."

Donna opened her eyes minutely and saw another car in the distance, it's side door open, that Martha Jones hanging out of it, wearing an oxygen mask over her face.

"But you must have crashed," the Doctor continued.

"Monthter," Donna said through her closed lips, unwilling to move any part of her face.

He nodded, "Yes, monsters," he agreed, a sort of clipped tone to his voice, like he wanted to continue talking, offer more of an explanation, but didn't have the time. "They made your car crash, you must have been close to the ground already, you would have died instantly if you were any higher up." He looked down at her, his eyes sweeping across her face, which must have looked pretty bad, because he grimaced and looked away, "But you're alright, Donna, nothing wrong with you I can't fix. You and James. I'll always fix you," he promised, his voice steely, like he'd promised this before, had failed to live up to it, and now was determined to succeed.

**DISCLAIMER: I can't think of anything witty right now, come back later. Oh, yeah, I don't own them.**


	11. Chapter 11

**AUTHORS NOTE: REVIEW! ahem, sorry about that, but....REVIEW!**

Donna walked with a limp when she was tired, and couldn't use her left hand properly, because the Doctor's miracle bone mending machine wasn't built for human bones. Donna spent an hour and a half everyday with an oxygen mask on, and wheezed and coughed if she overtaxed herself, because the Doctor couldn't heal all the damage the fog had done to her lungs. Donna couldn't see out of her left eye, or hear out of her left ear, because she went and fell on her head in the crash and gave herself brain damage or some such thing that the Doctor couldn't mend. But overall...yeah, she was good.

Better at the very least.

Five days since New New Earth and she could walk on legs that had been broken. She thought that was pretty fantastic.

But the Doctor was starting to grate on her nerves a bit. He treated both her and James like glass. He was afraid of touching either of them because he didn't want to handle them too roughly, he was afraid of landing the Tardis because they'd get jostled, he was afraid of opening the Tardis door because there would surely be an evil alien lurking behind a dumpster, and he was afraid that if he let them out of his sight for longer then two seconds that they would die. Because that's what had almost happened. Donna and James had almost died. An hour longer and the Doctor would have had to carry Donna and James's lifeless bodies back to the Tardis. And Donna knew all this, she really did, and she knew that James was the Doctor's _son_, and she was the Doctor's _friend_, but really, she needed some independence already.

But what annoyed her the most were his _eyes_, all chocolate brown and filled with concern and guilt. She'd enter a room sometimes, James on her hip, and would see the Doctor smiling at Martha, that twinkling happy smile, which would vanish when he saw her, replaced by a thin line and depressingly knitted eyebrows. _So_, she decided to land the Tardis. It couldn't be that hard she reasoned, she'd seen the Doctor do it plenty of times, she knew which levers to pull at what time, when to press the yellow button, and where to type the date and destination, it would be simple.

Donna took great care into strapping James securely to the carseat, smiling down at his face, soothing down his wild hair. "How about a trip to my Mum's? She was quite taken with you, didn't say so, of course, but it was there. You know, unsaid." Donna growled in frustration as the fingers of her left hand wouldn't close, she flexed her hand fervantly, hissing and rolling her eyes, "That is going to be so annoying," she whispered, moving over to the console and taking a deep breath. She began to have second thoughts, but then she slammed her eyes shut and pulled the first lever down.

From there it was a blur of motion and frightened squeaks. Because piloting the Tardis was _hard_. Especially because Donna had no real idea what she was doing.

She heard a crash from the hallway, a shout that sounded something akin to, 'what?', and then the lanky lord of Time himself came pelting into the control room. His eyes crazy wide, his hair sticking on end, and his mouth agape, staring at Donna at the controls in shock. "What?" he screamed, his hands coming up to either side of his head, tearing at his hair. "What the hell are you doing?"

Donna shrugged as well as she could as she ran around the console and hit the yellow button, "I'm not doing anything!" she lied.

The Doctor pointed at her, "You are obviously doing something!"

Donna sprinted around, her eyes meeting his briefly, she kicked a lever up as she raised towards the monitor, "I don't know, I...uh, I fell and hit a switch..."

The Tardis shook sending the Doctor down onto his backside, a dumbfounded expression still on his face, "You're flying my Tardis!" he screeched, "My Tardis!"

Donna rolled her eyes as she hit the button, the button hidden under the switch and behind the lever.

"How are you flying her? I didn't teach you!" He got to his feet, taking a step forwards before being thrown down again, James's giggling ringing in his ears.

With a thunk the Tardis landed and the silence hung heavy in the room.

Donna shuffled her feet as she went over to the Doctor, holding out a steady hand to help him up, grinning at him. "We're here."

The Doctor glared at her, "Where's here?" he asked grumpily, still seemingly upset that Donna could pilot the Tardis.

"My Mum's house," Donna told him, already unstrapping James from his seat.

"_Who's_ house?" he wailed.

Donna spun on her heel, looking at him uncertainly, "If you want..." she trailed off, looking at the Doctor, her eyes unclear, "You don't have to stay," she said in a rush.

The Doctor tilted his head, his eyebrow raised.

Donna continued as she shouldered her way past him, "It's okay, it's my Mum, I understand, how about you go show Martha the proper New York, give her a real adventure, no life threatening situation."

The Doctor looked confused, "You _want_ me to leave you?"

"No, no, you'll come back, for James and me obviously."

"Oh," the Doctor said, looking after her as she walked down the ramp, James's bag on her shoulder, "yeah, of course."

Donna spun around to face him, a serious expression on her face, "You will be back, you'll be back tomorrow, you'll show up at four o'clock in the afternoon, not a second later."

The Doctor smiled at her, "Yes, I will."

Donna let out a breath, smiled and walked out ot the blue box, hearing the sound of her mother sobbing over the departing Tardis instantly.

She ran to her front garden, falling to her knees besides her mothers rocking form, placing James on the soft grass before hugging her mothers shoulders. "Mum?" she asked, "Mum, what is it? Are you okay?"

Sylvia wailed, turning her face into Donna's shoulder, "I miss him, Donna, I want him back!"

Donna stroked her mothers short blonde hair, "Sh, come on, tell me, what's wrong?"

"He promised me forever," Sylvia whispered.

Donna looked down at her, suddenly frightened, "Are you talking about Dad? Where is he? Is Dad alright?"

Sylvia's head snapped up, hurt and sadness swimming in her eyes, "He's gone. Donna, you were there at the hospital."

"What do you mean, he's gone?"

Sylvia took a shaky breath, "He...he's gone."

**DISCLAIMER: Alright, okay, _fine_....I don't _own_ them _per se_, whatever.**


	12. Chapter 12

**AUTHORS NOTE: REVIEW! ahem, sorry about that, but....REVIEW!**

"James Geoff Noble. Born September second, 2006. The son of Donna Noble," Sylvia said, looking from the piece of paper to Donna. She placed the document inbetween them on the kitchen table, straightening it out, she took a deep breath, "Where's that Doctor? Why have you done this?"

Donna straightened her spine, holding James a little closer to her chest, "The Doctor didn't come back for me, Mum, it's been a month, I have to think about James's future now."

"This is how you do that?" her mother snapped, flicking the papers between them harhsly, "You bribe your mate Andrew at the government offices, you falsify documents-"

"It has to be this way!" Donna yelled, "It has to!"

Sylvia looked confused and angry, "Why?!" she screeched, standing up suddenly, thwacking her open palms down onto the tabletop, "Why does it have to be this way?! Why?"

Donna bit her lip, shaking her head sadly, "Please, Mum, just listen to me," she stood up, shifting James gently, "I have to protect him, he's," she struggled with the wording, "he's different, he's so different and I have to protect him. This way, this way he's my son," she tapped the documents lightly, "this, the governments own papers, say he's mine."

Sylvia turned away from Donna, raising her hands helplessly, "Donna, what have you gotten into?"

Donna sighed, she approached Sylvia, shaking her head, "I'm sorry, Mum, I'm really sorry."

Sylvia huffed out a breath, turning to look her daughter in the face, to tuck one of Donna's auburn strands of hair behind her ear, she patted Donna's cheek lightly, "A grandson," she whispered, looking down at James, "already four months old."

OOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOO

"Donna! He's beautiful!" Alice squeeled as soon as Donna walked into the resteraunt. She launched out of her chair, arms outstretched towards James, cooeing over him, "Oh, Donna, look he has your hair, and your eyes!"

Donna smiled, already growing weary of people remarking on how similair she and James looked.

Alice looked up at her, an amused grin on her face, "Not Lance's then," she said quietly.

Donna shook her head, making her face look suitably abashed and amused.

Alice laughed, "I didn't even know you were pregnant!" she said, a not very subtle question in her voice.

Donna took a deep breath, "I didn't want to tell anyone, sorry Alice. Not until I was sure I wanted to keep him."

"Oh," Alice gasped, "Oh, of course, I'm sorry," she said in a rush, her hands raised in apology. They sat down at their table, Alice looked at James some more, "How old is he? I can never tell with babies."

Donna smiled, "Five months in three days."

OOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOO

"Mum!" Donna shouted as she sprinted about the kitchen, frantically grabbing what she needed and shoving them into her purse, "Mum, where's my phone?! I have to go! I've got work!"

Sylvia's feet stamped down the stairs as she ran into the kitchen to grab a piece of toast that Wilf had made her, "Well, how am I supposed to know? How old are you, can't find your own phone," she grumbled as she filled her mouth with toast.

"Mu!" The kitchen that had been filled with sound went suddenly silent, Donna dropped the piece of toast she'd been holding as she turned to look at James, sitting up in his high chair, a sweet smile on his face as he stared straight at her. "Mu!"

Donna took a shaky step forward, "Jamie?" she whispered.

"Mu!" he said again, a smug look in his eyes.

Sylvia screeched like a banshee, grabbed Donna's shoulder, shaking her as tears of joy slipped out of her eyes, "Donna, he said it! He said it!"

Donna shook her head, raising her hands uncertainly, "No, that's not right, he's not even six months old!"

Sylvia looked disgruntled, "So he's a genius then, go on, be happy!"

Donna's mouth snapped shut, she had forgotten, forgotten that Sylvia believed James to be just a regular little boy.

**DISCLAIMER: I can't think of anything witty, let's just say I don't own them and leave it at that. kay?**


	13. Chapter 13

**_AUTHORS NOTE: Okay, I'm willing to make a deal...let's say you review....and....I'll really, really try to get the next one up faster. Eh? Ain't it fair?_**

Donna didn't remember the man but, to be quite frank, she honestly didn't try very hard to remember her coworkers faces. She was a temp, meaning anyone she met, from secretary to boss, was permament, while she was not, so why know who they are when you are going to be gone in two weeks? But he acted like he knew her, he was being friendly, which made her guilty, so she studied the man further, racking her memory. He certainly looked like a boss, with that fine suit and close cropped hair, not to mention that arrogant smile plastered on his face.

"Donna," he said, "I've been meaning to catch up, how are you?" he asked, smiling down at her.

"Fine, I'm fine," Donna spluttered, still trying to recognize this man.

He cocked his head to the side, his gray eyes regarding her warmly, "And Jamie?"

Donna smiled, as she did when anyone brought up James, "He's wonderful," she said.

"With a mother like you, how could he not?" the man said kindly as he reached out to touch her shoulder, to squeeze affectionately, his fingers lingering on, his smile faltering, before he continued. He shook his head, cleared his throat, and brought his hand away from her, "How old would he be now?"

"Almost eight months," Donna said as she pulled her phone out, turning it to show the man the wallpaper, a beautiful picture of her baby boy, "he's growing more everyday, he'll be getting his A-levels soon!" Donna joked.

The man took her phone, slipping it free of her weak grasp easily, the arrogance gone from his expression, "Oh, he is beautiful," he looked up at her, his eyes roving across her face before looking back down at the phone, "just like his mum," he said.

Donna's eyebrows rose, not used compliments, especially in regards to her physical appearence, well...except for her Dad, but that's what Dad's do, tell you you're awesome...but he'd been gone for a while now.

"He's so tiny, and do I hear right, he's talking?" he asked, handing her back her phone, his cold fingers ghosting over hers for a moment to long.

Donna ignored her stirring unease, sure that this boss, whoever he was, was probably just overly tactile, and as long as he wasn't 'accidently' brushing agaisnt her breasts, she was fine with it. She chuckled as she put her phone back in her pocket, "No," she said, "not really, he knows 'Mu' and 'No', that's about the extent of his vocab."

"Mu?" he questioned good naturedly.

She wrinkled her nose in mirth, her eyes narrowing into happy slits, "Yeah, been trying for 'Mum' since he was six months, just can't get it though."

"He will," he assured her, "he's a genius, after all."

Donna's smile froze, her body stilling, as she looked up at the man, suddenly feeling like she should be more suspicious then she was, but something about the man conveyed kindness, honesty, and Donna couldn't for the life of her figure out what. "Yeah, he really is," she agreed.

The man smiled down at her before reaching into his pocket, pulling out a little card, like a business card, "All mothers need some time to themselves though, don't they?" he asked her, handing her the delicate card. "A celebration," he said, noticing her confused expression, "A scientist, Lazarus, he's made a giant breakthrough, it's a thouroughly posh affair. I was able to snatch more then my share of invites, knew you'd enjoy the party if nothing else."

Donna raised a ginger eyebrow, playing the card inbetween her long fingers, "Lazarus?" she echoed, her disbelief clear.

He chuckled, raising his hands in defense, "I swear, that's his name." He turned his head slightly, looking down the hallway towards where another man was gesturing at him, pointing to his watch emphatically. "Ah," he lamented, turning to her, his eyes traveling across her face, "our time is cut short."

"Mr. Saxon!" the man at the end of the hall called, stomping his foot lightly, glaring down at his watch.

_Ah_, she thought, _so you're Mr. Saxon_, _a good name_, she smiled up at him, pocketing the invite, "Thank you, maybe I'll see you there, Mr. Saxon."

His smile turned a little melancholy, like he expected her to call him something else, "Perhaps," he said quietly. He leaned forward quickly, his head ducking down to kiss her on the cheek, his cool lips lingering on her blushing cheeks, Donna to shocked to do much but stand there. "Good bye, my beautiful brown eyed girl," he whispered in her ear before he stepped away from her, practically running down the hallway, where there were now five men waiting for him.

Before Donna could stop herself she called out after him, "My eyes are blue!"

He turned his head only slightly, to look at her out of the corner of his eye, to grin at her, before he walked out the door.

**Disclaimer: How about I own Donna Noble, the Master, and...Harriet Jones, and all the rest you can keep? What do you mean _no_?**


	14. Chapter 14

**AUTHORS NOTE: Come on! IF this one doesn't deserve a review....well, then by the Gods, what does?**

Donna stood in front of her mirror, for the first time noticing how much weight she had lost, how...good she looked. She twirled in front of the mirror, smiling at how her dress fit her shape. She hadn't been trying to lose weight, but she had been getting quite tired of people telling her how hard baby weight was to get rid of, which would have been fine, except...you know, she didn't actually carry James or give birth to him, not that her friends knew that...but it was insulting all the same.

"It's nice, isn't it?" she asked, turning to look at James, who was sitting on her bedspread. He gurgled at her, sticking his toy giraffe into his mouth as he smiled up at her, his blue eyes twinkling. "Not too tight?" she asked, running a hand down the black material covering her flat stomach.

Sylvia strolled in through the open doorway, frowning in a happy sort of way,"That's what you're going in?" she asked, picking James up from the bed, placing him on her hip.

"Yeah," Donna said, turning back to the mirror, "I like it," she added, already defensive.

Sylvia looked at her, at her reflection, "Well, it could be worse," her mother sighed, strolling over to stand behind Donna, running a gentle hand over Donna's red hair, "What are you going to do with it?" she asked.

"I'm leaving it down," Donna said, leaning in towards the mirror as she picked up her silver earings, turning her head to the side.

"Oh, Donna, put it up won't you, you're not going 'round the pub," her mother said, rolling her eyes as she turned away from Donna. Donna maintained a stony silence as she turned her head to the other side and put in her other earing. Sylvia sat down on the bed, placing James on her lap, "Well," Sylvia sighed, trying to smile, "at least you haven't straightened it, you know how much I hate that."

"Yeah."

"It looks more natural, with a bit of curl," Sylvia continued, looking at Donna sadly, like she'd only now realized that she'd been mean to her only daughter. "It's nice, Donna, you look lovely, Donna?"

Donna turned to look at Sylvia, her chin raised, her full lips pulled into a thin line, "What, Mum?"

Sylvia swallowed, looking up at her daughter, smiling, "Have fun," she said.

Donna's eye's softened, sighing she went over to her mother and kissed her on the cheek, "Thank's Mum, I'm going, car keys are on the table?"

"Yes," Sylvia stood up and followed Donna out the bedroom door, down the stairs, and into the kitchen, Sylvia suddenly rethought her words, she nudged Donna's elbow, staring at her as she turned, "But not too much fun," she warned.

Donna's face scrunched up, annoyance clear on her pale features, "Mum," she groaned.

Sylvia shook her head, "Don't you 'Mum' me, as if I don't remember exactly how much you love a good party." Sylvia stalked off and put James in his high chair, before turning, hands on her hips, one eyebrow rasied as she peered at Donna, "Don't expect me to come get you if you drink too much," she warned.

"Oh my God, Mum," Donna said, rolling her eyes, but with a smile on her lips, "I was thirteen years old! Will you ever let it go?"

Sylvia smiled as she turned towards the cupboards, "Never."

"I'm going now," Donna said as she picked up the car keys, throwing them in the air before catching them again and begining to walk out of the room.

"Where's you purse?"

Donna turned on her heel, which is very hard to do when wearing such tall heels, she smiled as she shoved her pale hands into the hidden pockets of her knee-length dress, "Pockets," she said, a haughty eyebrow raised.

Sylvia rolled her eyes and sat down at the table, picking up the tin of peaches with a look of disgust on her face, like she couldn't comprehend why on Earth anyone would want to eat peaches, before she looked back up, a reproachful look in her eyes, "But not too much fun," she warned again, pointing the can of peaches at Donna ominously.

Donna laughed as she bent over James, "Give Mummy a kiss," she said before kissing James on the cheek, he giggled and tried to swipe at her with his toy giraffe, which she skillfully avoided. "Goodbye Grandad!" she called into the living room as she walked through the hallway.

Wilf's smiling face turned away from the telly, "Lucky I'm letting you out of the house looking like that!" he called after her, laughing as she stuck her tongue out at him as she shut the door.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

She walked into the large, beautiful, bright, shiny room with a smile, and a curious glance towards the odd looking machine in the center of the room, but her curiousity was dimmed when she saw the champagne boy coming towards her. But before she could get a glass of bubbly in her hand a voice called to her, authoritive and giddy, Mr. Saxon appeared at her elbow.

"Donna," Mr. Saxon said, his voice without any trace of mockery or arrogance, "You're so lovely," he told her, hugging her briefly. She laughed at that, shaking her head and pushing him back slightly, but he held her tighter, staring down at her face, "You're lovely," he repeated, more forcefully, like he wanted more then anything for her to believe him.

"Alright," she agreed, half hearted as she stepped out of his awkward embrace, looking him over, she had to admit, he did look quite fit in that tux.

"Presentable?" he laughed, holding his arms out, ready for inspection.

"I suppose," she said, grinning at him, knowing full well that he knew how good he looked.

"My wife made me dress up," he said, hushed low, his eyes scanning for the woman that was his wife, "she told me, 'If I have to wear a dress, you're wearing a tux!' Can you believe that? No respect," he whispered, smiling at her, his gray eyes twinkling, but Donna didn't get the joke.

Donna turned her head to look at the party goers, "Which one is she?" she asked, imagining a young blonde in her mind. He pointed over her shoulder towards the chamagne boy, Donna raised an eyebrow, "Yeah, she's a true beauty," she dead panned, looking at Mr. Saxon.

He looked confused, "Hmmm?" he asked, he looked down at his finger, then up at where it was pointing, "ah, I see," he said as he moved his finger a fraction to the left.

There was a woman in a short, sleeveless, but not slutty, dark purple dress standing next to the champagne boy, an empty glass of champagne in one hand and a half full one in the other, but the way she was chugging it down it would soon be empty, she was leggy, curvy, and pale. She had a brilliant smile, wide and friendly, she had brown eyes, and long, full, red hair that fell across her shoulders and halfway down her back, she was _gorgeous. _"She's beautiful!" Donna cried, "I thought for sure you'd have a blonde!"

Mr. Saxon chuckled, "No, never blonde," he murmered, his eyes traveling across Donna's hair.

A slimy looking man with slicked back hair walked up to Mr. Saxon's elbow, started whispering in his ear as he gave Donna the death eye, Mr. Saxon's brow furrowed and he turned to speak to the man more fully. Donna, who, despite what her mother thought, was polite, she edged away, not needing, nor wanting to listen the men converse. She looked at the room, at all the people in their fine clothes, and the great machine in the center of it, thinking that perhaps she'd start the fun now.

But Mr. Saxon was back at her side, "It seems that our time is always running short, Donna," he told her, smiling down at her sadly, his gaze lingering on her face. "An unexpected turn of events have irrevocably damaged all the fantastic plans I made tonight," he said, his hand coming to cradle her bent elbow, his thumb carassing the bare skin, "I'll see you very soon, Donna," he said, a strange smirk on his face, his arrogance returning as he bent down to kiss her on the cheek. Then he was walking away, coming up to his wife, speaking with her, grabbing her hand with a scowl, pulling her after him as he walked out the door.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Donna saw Martha. She gaped.

Martha saw Donna. She smiled.

Donna saw the Doctor. She growled.

The Doctor didn't see Donna.

Donna slapped the Doctor. _Hard._

People turned to look at them, the Doctor looked shocked as he placed his hand on his stinging cheek, "Donna!" he squeeled, "What did you do that for?" he asked, sneakily putting Martha in between himself and Donna.

Donna placed her hands on her hips, glaring at the Doctor, her eyes stabbing into him as if they were tiny blue daggers, her upper lip raised up in a sneer, "What did I do that for?" she asked, her voice quiet, dangerous, the Doctor took another step back. Donna laughed, a cold laugh that barely escaped her lips, "What did I do that for?" she repeated, her head tilting a fraction to the left.

Martha took a step towards Donna, her hands raised, smiling at her, "Donna-"

But Donna cut her off, "How long?" she asked, her voice still so, so quiet.

"What? I don't know what-"

Donna snapped, she visibly snapped, like a rubber band being shot at someone, her arm shot out, snaring Martha's wrist, clasping it, trapping it, squeezing it, "How long, since you've seen me?" Donna said, pulling Martha forwards, away from the Doctor and then releasing her.

Martha rubbed her wrist, peering at Donna with wariness, "A few days," she said, shrugging.

Donna stepped closer to the Doctor, invading his personal space, he cowered away from her, but tried to hide it, "Doctor," Donna began, her voice still so eerily quiet, which was worse then if she'd been yelling, "do you know how long it's been since _I've_ seen _you_?" she asked.

The Doctor shook his head, swallowing as he glanced Martha, who took a step back with a look that said 'no way, that's all yours.'

"Months," Donna continued, ignoring their exchange, her blue eyes murderous, "Months we've been here!" she hissed, her fiery hair seeming to spark about her enraged face. The Doctor opened his mouth, his hand already reaching to scratch the back of his neck, but Donna would have none of it. "Months of living with my Mum, months of lying and hiding because if anyone knew what James really was they'd take him from me!" The Doctor's mouth closed with an audible snap. "Months of working humilating jobs so my son can have food to eat! Clothes to wear! Toys to play with!" Donna continued, her eyes no longer looking at the Doctor, merely pointing at him.

"_Your_ son?" the Doctor asked, sounding shocked and confused and angry all at once.

Donna's eyes regained focus faster then a lightening bolt could kill a horse, she glared up at the Doctor, her teeth bared, "_My_ son," she repeated, daring him to proceed.

The Doctor closed the gap between them, his nose just fractions from hers as he tried to intimidate her, "James isn't yours," he whispered, his tone icy, "he's _mine. _My son."

"Funny that," Donna said tipping her head back, "because it seemed to me that you couldn't wait to be rid of him."

"Don't say that," the Doctor said through clenched teeth, starring down at Donna, the Oncoming Storm brewing in his brown eyes.

Donna smiled at him, a cold smile, showing her teeth as if they were fangs, "Since the day I met you, you couldn't give one thought to James," she raised her eyebrow, "running off to save the world, leaving you _precious _baby boy with a total stranger?" she asked, mocking him, "Does that sound familair?"

The Doctor's barred his teeth, his nose wrinkling as his hands formed fists.

"Or how about this?" Donna said, "You never held him, or fed him, or changed him, you ignored him, and me, until _suddenly _you remembered we existed and would deign us with your presence. Children aren't toys, you can't grow bored with them and walk away and then want to play with them again."

The Doctor looked about as murderous as Martha or Donna had ever seen him, "I love James, he's my son, Rose's son-" he said quietly, so quietly that Martha had to strain to hear him.

Donna's head tilted to the side, her red hair spilling over her shoulder, sadness mixing with anger in her eyes, "And that's why you can't bear him, isn't it?" she asked, saying a truth that she'd realized long ago, "Because every time you _look _at him, you feel your heart breaking, you feel her absence like a knife in your back, you love James, Doctor, I know that." She stepped away from him, walking backwards towards Martha, "But you always did love Rose more."

**Disclaimer: Wait, you're telling me it's _not _mine?**


	15. Chapter 15

**Authors Note: It's short, but every good thing in life is...yeah, you're right, that is depressing...**

The Doctor took three steps forward, his eyes dark as he grabbed Donna by the upper arms, pulling her forwards until her face was inches from his own. "Stop it," he growled, his fingers digging into Donna's exposed skin without mercy, his strong hands like iron bands. He shook her, just a tiny bit, with just enough force to knock Donna's head backwards, her hair flying through the air, "You don't know what you're saying," he said.

Martha's wide eyed face came forward, tugging desperately at the Doctor's hand, "Doctor, what are you doing?" she squeaked, desperate eyes imploring him to stop. But he didn't even look at her.

Donna wasn't frightened, not really, she'd been with many men, she'd been hit many times, but she'd never expected this, not from the Doctor...never from him. She squirmed in his grasp, "Get off me," she hissed, her hands rising and splaying out across his chest, pushing at him, but he was as immovable as a brick wall.

"You don't know Rose, don't talk about her!" he said, his voice raised, his breath blowing across Donna's face, his teeth barred. "She was brilliant, and beautiful, she made life worth living, she gave me a son!" He shook her again, his eyes wide, "Rose is James mother, she'll always be his mother! You'll never be good enough!"

His words stung...they really, really stung. But Donna had known broken men before, they said and did things that they regretted later. She could only hope the Doctor would regret this one day.

The Doctor was pulled back suddenly, he kept his hold on Donna for just a second, tugging her along with him before letting her go, pushing her away roughly. Donna lost her balance, she was this close to falling to the floor when a long and lean arm shot out and helped her stay upright. It was a woman in a golden gown, she looked at Donna with concerned eyes, "Are you alright?" she asked, her fingers ghosting over Donna's bruised arms.

Donna nodded as she turned her head to see the Doctor, he was being restrained by a handsome young man in a tux, he wasn't struggling.

"Leo!" Martha squaked, glaring at the man in the tux, "Let him go!" she cried.

The man threw the Doctor away from him, away from Donna.

The Doctor glared at Donna, muttering as he walked away, his hands in his pockets, not slowing down to wait for Martha, who followed in his wake.

"Thank you," Donna said, her voice subdued, suddenly realizing that the Doctor hadn't been in control, that he could have, and probably _would_ have, hurt her.

"Francine Jones," the woman introduced, then gesturing at the young man, "my son, Leo."

Donna swallowed, smiling shakily at her, "You're Martha's mum?"

Francine nodded.

Donna snagged a glass of champagne off a tray, "That's brilliant," she said before taking a large gulp of the bubbly drink.

Then the brightness of the lights lowered and an old man walked up to stand next to the machine in the center of the room.

**DISCLAIMER: Okay, I want a pair of pink converse...um, a Gir sweatshirt, and...the rights of Doctor Who. Huh, what, I'm not getting _any_ of them?**


	16. Chapter 16

**Authors Note: Donna and the Jones seem to have struck up a crazy friendship, ain't it wonderful?**

"Tish!" Francine called, turning in her golden gown to see her lovely daughter act the social butterfly.

Donna swayed dangerously to the left as she turned with Francine, nearly toppling over in her heels, "TISH!" she exclaimed, smiling and raising her glass of alcohol. "A toast, to Tish!" she called, stomping her foot down on the ground.

The rest of the room looked over, smiled indulgently and raised their own glasses as Tish scrambled over to her mother, "Mum! Will you take the glass away from her!"

Donna glared, "Oi! I'm an adult-"

"Yes, we know," Leo interupted, smiling as he pulled her champagne glass from her clutching hands.

"You," Donna shook her head, her eyes fluttering as she pointed a wobbly finger at Leo, "You're just like the Doctor, telling me...me what to do," she lurched forward and would have landed right on the ground if Leo hadn't caught her.

He laughed, an amused smile playing on his lips as he looked down at Donna, "Donna, not that you're not fit, but I've got a girl."

Donna rolled her eyes as she bent down, hanging off of Leo's elbow as she took off her shoes, "You wish," she muttered.

Francine took a step towards them, running a gentle hand through Donna's hair as Donna stood upright again, her tall black heels dangling from her fingers. Francine turned narrowed eyes towards Tish, "Tish, have you seen Martha and that Doctor anywhere?"

Donna let out a giant breath of air, "That Doctor, stupid Doctor," she leaned towards Tish, reaching out and placing a hand on her arm, "men," she hissed, "all they ever do is hurt you."

"Not since the demonstration," Tish said, smiling a sad smile at Donna, patting her hand affectionately.

Francine gripped Donna's shoulder, plying her away from Tish, turning her face towards her own, "Donna, can you tell me about this Doctor? Where did Martha meet him?"

"Met her on the moon," Donna said confidently, a sharp nod of her head sending her hair flying.

"Come on Mum, she's pissed," Leo said, chuckling as he took a sip of Donna's discarded champagne.

"No!" Donna denied, then she tilted her head to the side, "Well, alright, but he did meet Martha on the moon." Donna fluttered her hands about in a useless gesture as she continued, "Her hospital, Royal Saint or what ever it was-"

"Royal Hope," Francine interupted, nodding.

"It was transported to the moon by a platoon of Judoon...blimey, that's a hell of a sentance, anyway, they were chasing a plasmavore-"

"A what?" Leo asked, an eyebrow raised.

Donna looked at him, her fingers curling in the air, her shoes hanging limply from her hands, "It's space vampire," she said slowly, aware of how silly she sounded.

Francine snorted and took a sip of her own champagne, "Leo's right, you _are_ pissed," she said, laughing.

"Hello," a silky voice said, from directly behind Tish, which made all Jones's jump and Donna blink.

Tish turned, her hand jumping above her heart, "Professor Lazarus, we didn't see you, sir," she said.

"A thing quickly made right, thought I would say hello," he said, his newly blonde head tilting endearingly to the side.

Donna glared at him from behind her flame colored bangs, "My Nan told me never to trust a man who looks good for his age," she said.

"I'm sorry, Professor," Tish gushed, looking appalled at Donna, who trutted her chin out, her arms crossed.

Lazarus glided into their little circle, easily standing in the center as he took Donna's unwilling hand, sending disdainful glances at her bare feet, "My dear lady," he said, observing her with a smirk, "you're 'Nan' is obviously a brilliant woman, might I inquire, is it hereditary?"

Donna tilted her head to the side as she slowly pulled back her hand, "Might _I_ inquire, is arrogance hereditary?"

He stiffened, his lips puckering as the insult registered, he crossed his own arms, staring daggers at Donna, who was, to be honest, a tad to drunk to truly notice. He turned away from her, a disgusted noise escaping his throat, "Ah" he exclaimed, grasping Tish's elbow, "Tish, I wondered if you'd join me-"

"Oi!" Donna said, "we're having a conversation here."

Lazarus didn't turn around, only led Tish further away, Tish looking over her shoulder at her mother uncertainly. "Hey, old man! I said-"

The Doctor ran _straight _into Donna's back, cutting off her sentance and knocking the air out of her lungs, he didn't even look at her, "Tish!" he said, "Get away from him!" he ordered, his arms outstretched, as if he expected Tish to leap into his arms.

Tish's lip sneered upwards, her eyes lingering on Donna for a second, on the half formed bruises on her upper arms, "Don't tell me what to do," she said finally, glaring at the Doctor.

The Doctor lowered his arms, looking at Donna out of the corner of his eye, noticing the way both Leo and Francine were grouped around her.

"Over here, Tish," Martha said quietly, beckoning her sister towards her, "please."

With an uneasy glance at Lazarus Tish moved forward.

Francine hmmphed loudly, snaring one of Donna's wrists and one of Martha's, one in each hand, "What is going on?" she hissed, looking in between the two.

They glanced at each other, Donna shrugged, Martha looked uncertain, and then Lazarus began making really funky cracking sounds. Lazarus was turning into a crazy giant spider/scorpian man thing with scary claws and a square mouth with fangs right in front of their eyes. Donna gaped, "Oh my god!" she gasped, stepping away, her black heels falling from her loose grasp as she dragged Francine with her in her retreat. "Is that, is that his _brain_?" she asked. And indeed, it was, they could see his brain through his skull.

"RUN!" the Doctor screamed, which was somewhat useless, because every single person in the room was already heading for the doors, screaming their posh little heads off. Half of them were already through the glass doors in the corner.

Except one woman, standing stupidly right in the path of the monster, her glass of alcohol still in her hand. Before Donna could even think she was hurtling towards the woman, pushing her behind her, looking up into the terrible face of Lazarus.

Right before he should have struck, recognition flared in his still blue eyes, he seemed to freeze, to stutter to a stop, hissing unintelligible words through his grotesque mouth. But one word, one _name, _was clear, 'Saxon' he hissed, 'Saxon'.

The Doctor looked at Donna, for the first time since the last time, looked at her like she was something he'd never seen before.

He screamed at Lazarus then, insulting words, words that made Lazarus turn away from Donna, to growl at him, leaping over tables to chase the Doctor out into the hallway.

"No!" Donna screamed, "No, Doctor don't!" But he was already gone.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The rest of the night was a blur to Donna, because, honestly, she didn't actually hold her liquor all that well and never had.

She recalled running down the stairs with Martha and her family.

She recalled the look on Francine's face when Martha ran away from her, ran back for the Doctor. It was the same look her own mother had given her after she chose the Doctor, after running away from her ruined wedding reception. Donna had to wonder, was it like this with every mother?

She recalled puking in a bin while good old Leo held back her hair.

Then the Doctor seemed to have saved the day.

Then the Doctor got slapped, but not by her, which was gratifying.

There was a crash, the Doctor ran away, Martha followed him, Tish followed her, while Donna couldn't do more then sit sprawled on the steps of the building. She leaned her head down on Leo's shoulder, not truly worried, in her drunken stupor she _knew _the Doctor would save the day. Because he was _the Doctor._

And when she heard the Tardis engines in her kitchen the next morning she wasn't surprised...

**DISCLAIMER: Okay, okay, Hermit you'll get the Master, Geeky you'll get Rose, Black Panther you can have Jack, huh, what? _Fine _the tenth Doctor too, I know, I know, they shouldn't be lonely. That leaves Donna for me...good we have an agreeme-**

**Oh, Hey, RTD! No, we weren't doing anything, nothing at all! These suspicious looking diagrams? No, just doodles!**


	17. Chapter 17

**AUTHORS NOTE: You didn't actually think the Doctor turned into DomesticViolence!Doctor for no reason, did you?**

The Tardis, in all it's blue and boxy glory, now stood in the corner of Donna's kitchen, standing there as if it had every single right to be there. Donna couldn't help thinking that it clashed terribly with the yellow walls behind it. She put her coffee mug down on her table, breathing in a calming breath as she tightened the sash at her waist, wishing that she was wearing more clothes then she was. Shorts, a tank top, and a short bathrobe were hardly the attire she wished to wear when being reunited with the time traveling alien who had abanded her and his son. But...oh, whatever...

Not to mention the hangover from hell, she never seemed to remember that drinking in excess led to terrible headaches.

She tilted her chin up as the creaky door opened, the Doctor walked out, Martha behind him. The Doctor stopped abruptly, he kept the table between Donna and himself, he put his hands in his pockets as far as they would go, his shoulders hunched, looking at Donna with an unreadable expression.

Martha rounded the table, smiling at Donna, "You got home alright?" she asked.

Donna kept looking at the Doctor, even though her words were for Martha, "Yeah, some bloke gave me a lift," Donna could practically _feel_ Martha's eyebrows rise.

"Some bloke?" Martha echoed, "Who was he? Did you know him?"

"Said his name was Mitten," Donna said as she turned to look at Martha, she smiled at Donna's worried and slightly anxious face, "Don't worry, mate," Donna assured, "he was fun." She moved over to the coffee machine, taking the half full coffee pot and gesturing at Martha, "Either of you want coffee?" she asked, glancing at the Doctor briefly as she opened the cupboard and picked up a clean mug.

The Doctor swallowed, "Donna," he began, his voice serious.

Donna slammed the cupboard door shut, wincing as the sound resonated in her head, "Yes or no?" she asked.

He shook his head, "No, no, thank you," he muttered.

"Martha?" Donna asked.

Martha looked between the Doctor and Donna, nodding, "I'd love some, thanks Donna," she said as they accepted the bright pink coffee mug filled with steaming coffee.

Donna walked to the table and refilled her own cup before looking at the Doctor again as she placed the coffee pot back into the machine.

"Donna," he said, looking at her, his gaze ranging from her bare feet and legs to her red hair still dripping wet from her morning shower, "I'm sorry-"

"You're always sorry," she muttered, taking a sip of her coffee.

His brown eyes shot up to stare directly into her blue ones, Donna saw the familiar flash of anger in them and against her will she flinched back, spilling scalding coffee onto her hand. She let a little yelp of pain, unceremoniously dropping her mug of coffee in the sink as she turned on the cold water, letting the clear liquid run over her pink skin. Martha came up behind her, tuttering medical jargon, "God damn it!" Donna seethed, pushing Martha back as she leaned against the sink.

"I-I'm sorry," the Doctor said, walking up beside Donna, his hands coming under the cold water, cradling Donna's hand there, his brown eyes sad as he looked at the pink skin.

Donna turned her head, "Why didn't you come back?" she seethed, her voice much too loud.

The Doctor stiffened, as if she'd called him a terrible name, he didn't look up, "It hasn't been that long for us," he said quietly, his long fingers running over Donna's hand, rubbing the cold water into her skin.

"You left us! Why?" she hadn't realized it until now, how truly _angry _she was, how _close _she was to losing it. She was as angry she'd ever been, well, maybe that time Joey Patrone threw her out of the car...she was angry then as well. No, she was definately angrier at the Doctor. Or that time when Ryan...you know what, no, she was angry at the Doctor and that was that. "Well? Did you forget us?"

"No," he mumbled, "of course not."

"Then _what_?" she demanded.

"I thought I had time," he said, finally looking up at her, his face almost too close to hers, "I just needed time, Rose hasn't been gone that long, and you and James you were always _there,_" he inclined his head towards hers.

"Oh, we were? Really?" she asked, mocking him as she slipping her hand out of his, turning off the cold water as she wiped her hand over her bathrobe. "Your son and the woman you asked to come along? We were _there,_ were we?"

"Donna, please calm down," he said, raising his hands pleadingly.

Donna let out an insulted breath of air, "Be _calm_?" she asked, "Calm?" She pointed an enraged finger at the Doctor, "Why should I? Why should I listen to you?" The Doctor shook his head, looking for all the world the patient man, he opened his mouth to speak, but Donna decided she didn't really want to hear what he had to say. "Doctor, just get out!" she pushed him backwards, he stumbled against the table.

He snagged her wrist, "Donna, please stop," he said, his voice strained.

Donna tore her arm away, "This is _my _house! Get out!"

"I'm not leaving without James!" he screamed, straightening himself, pushing back against the table, almost knocking it over.

"You're not taking my son anywhere!" Donna screeched, looking up as she heard her mothers footsteps from upstairs.

"James is _my _son!" the Doctor screamed, seemingly unaware of Martha pulling on his arm, "Thank you for taking care of him, but he belongs with me! In the Tardis!"

He took a step towards the hallway, Donna launched herself in front of him, blocking the doorway, looking less intimidating then she would have liked in her tiny bathrobe, "Don't you dare," she hissed.

The Doctor looked over her, shaking his head as he shoved her, almost gently, to the side and ran into the hall.

"NO!" Donna screamed, following after him, she cut through the living room, beating him to the stairs by a fraction of a second, she blocked his path again, one hand agaisnt the wall, the other on the banister. "Doctor, don't dare touch him."

"Donna, just move," the Doctor said.

Donna shook her head stubbornly.

The Doctor lunged forward, wrapping his arms around Donna, not bothering to pin her arms to her sides as he lifted her feet clear off the floor, "Martha, go get James!" the Doctor ordered, for the first time looking behind his shoulder at Martha.

"Wha-"

"GO, go get him, now!"

Donna screamed, wordless screeches that she couldn't control as she hit the Doctor with her closed fists, smacking him solidly in the back and head. "Mum!" she screamed, "Mum!"

Sylvia Noble emerged at the top of the stairs, still in her nightclothes and fuzzy slippers, her mouth opened in shock, "Donna?!"

The Doctor growled, _actually _growled, and threw Donna to the floor. He sprinted up the steep steps of Donna's house, "Mum! James, go and lock the door!" Donna screamed, scrambling to her feet and racing after the Doctor.

James shared a room with Donna, and Donna's room was the first one on the landing, Sylvia was there in less then a blink of an eye, slamming the door hard enough to rattle the hinges, there was a solid click as it locked. The Doctor was there, his sonic screwdriver already whining away when Donna got to him, she grabbed his arm, tugging on him. "Stop it! Just stop it!"

He flung his arm out without looking, striking Donna across the face, she fell to the floor, tears running down her cheeks. "Doctor!"

She stood, getting between him and the door, punching him repeatedly, he looked at her with uncontrolable eyes, she knew that look. Donna had seen that look on the faces of at least six different men, right before they hurt her they looked at her with that face. She lunged forward, her open palms against his chest, knocking him backwards. He grabbed her wrists. They both toppled down the stairs.

Donna landed, the Doctor landed on top of her, a sickening crunch echoed up the stairs.

The Doctor scrambled off of Donna, some amount of awareness returning to his eyes as she began to scream, clutching at her arm. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he said, retreating to sit on the stairs.

"You broke my arm! You broke my _bloody_ arm!" Donna screeched as Martha ran over, kneeling next to Donna. "You BASTARD!"

The Doctor scuttled towards the wall, shaking from head to toe, "I'm sorry."

"Sorry doesn't unbrake my arm, you fool!"

"I'm sor-"

"What is wrong with you?!"

The Doctor stopped shaking, he looked at Donna like she was an angel, "Donna, oh Donna," he said.

Donna sat up with Martha's help, ignoring Martha's medical words as she starred at the Doctor, there was something different about him. This man sitting on the stairs in front of her was suddenly the man she remembered, a good man. "What the _hell _is going on? You _hit _me!"

"I'm sorry," he said, but with the usual blase tone, he crawled forward on his hands and knees towards Donna, "You're right!" he cried, "There _is_ something wrong with me!"

"Am I meant to congragulate you?" Donna seethed, tears still leaking out of her eyes as she looked down at her arm.

"Well, no, I suppose not," the Doctor muttered. He looked up, his brown eyes smiling, "But now that I see it, I can fix it!"

"Fix what?!"

"Me! Fix me!" he stood up, looking at Martha and Donna on the floor, smiling like an idiot, "My mind was connected to Rose's, Time Lord's have a link with their mate, but it can't get through, not anymore, that's why I've been acting this way. I'm sorry Donna, so sorry!" then he leaped over Donna, ignoring her sobs as Martha cooed over her arm, he raced back to the Tardis and slammed the door shut.

**DISCLAIMER: So, hey, uh, RTD, how do you feel about a timeshare type option? You get half the episodes, I get half, plus the specials. No? Oh, yeah, whatever...so, when is Moffat taking the reigns? Oh, no reason.**


	18. Chapter 18

**AUTHORS NOTE: Okay, okay, Donna may be too forgiving, but just hear me out.**

"It's not broken," Martha crooned, pushing Donna's hair behind her ear, "sh, sh, it's alright."

"Mum!" Donna called, trying and failing to rise from the floor, she crumpled back onto the ground, "Mum! Don't call the police! DON'T!" she ordered, knowing that her mother probably already had the phone in her hand.

Sylvia's voice drifted down the stairs, muffled through the bedroom door yet still audible, "And why the bloody hell not?!" she screeched, "Where's that Doctor?"

"He's gone! Come out! Please, I can hear Jamie crying!"

Donna could swear she heard her mother grumble as she unlatched the bedroom door, she poked her head out onto the landing, James on her hip. Her eyes grew wide as she saw Donna at the foot of the stairs, "Oh my god," she hushed, stumbling down the stairs in her haste, "Donna, are you alright?" Sylvia kneeled down next to Donna, glaring at Martha, "What she doing here? She was with that Doctor."

"It's fine, Mum," Donna said, running a gentle hand over James's crying face.

Martha moved her head like a snake, getting her face in front of Donna's, her eyes to her eyes, "Donna, you're arm's not broken, the shoulder is dislocated. I can fix it, but it's going to hurt, do you understand?"

Sylvia hissed at her, "Get away from her, she needs a doctor."

Donna huffed at the irony, Martha smiled a tiny bit. Donna nodded her head, "Go on then," she breathed, her body already tense, awaiting the pain she knew was imminent. Martha grabbed her wrist and her shoulder and did some sort of wrenching thing that ended with a sick pop and a crunch. Donna blacked out.

She woke up later in her own bed, she was on her side and James was sleeping peacefully in the crook of her arm. The Doctor was sitting on the floor of her bedroom, directly opposite her and James, his back against the wall, his knees drawn up. Sunlight was filtering in through the closed curtain above the Doctor's head, Donna could see that his brown eyes were resting on little James.

"He's grown so much," he whispered, looking up at her briefly before returning his gaze to the child.

Donna sighed as she looked over at the Doctor, she was angry at him, of course she was, for abandoning them, for hitting her, for sitting and _watching _her sleep like a weirdo. But he seemed so terribly sad now, she couldn't yell at him now.

"I suppose I didn't realize how long...how long I'd left you," the Doctor said, one hand rubbing across his face, "it's no wonder you've grown attached."

"I love him," Donna said, whispering only because the Doctor was.

He looked up at her, smiling wistfully, "I love him too," he said, shrugging before turning his face away, looking across her room.

Donna watched him silently as he seemed to evaulate her room, his eyes registering the rugs on her floor, mismatched and on top of each other, each one was a different shade of red. Then upwards towards her dresser, most of her drawers opened, their contents mushed inside with no real regard for order. His eyes traveled sideways towards the corner of the room Donna called James's, his crib was there, it was small and worn, it had been Donna's when she was a child. His eyes moved upwards, smiling at the pictures on the walls, pictures of Donna's Mum and Dad, of her grand parents and Aunts and Uncles and cousins, old friends, new friends, and of James. "No pictures of yourself," he said, not looking at her.

"Did Gramps give you that black eye?" she asked, smiling proudly at his messed up face.

"Yeah, he did, he had a few choice words for me," he tilted his head up, regarding the ceiling, where plastic glow in the dark stars were attached with hot glue. "Did you get those for James?" he asked.

Donna smiled, "No, those have been there as long as I've been here, mate."

The Doctor looked back down at her, his eyebrows raised, "Why?"

"I don't know," Donna murmered, looking at him as she played with James's hair, "I've always loved the stars."

The Doctor climbed up to his knees, shuffling forwards until he could rest his elbows on Donna's bed, "Donna, I'm sorry," he said.

Donna sighed.

"No, please listen," the Doctor whispered, his eyes imploring. He looked down at James, "Her name was Rose Tyler and she was my everything," he said quietly, "I met her right after a war, the Time War, she made life worth living again. We made a bond, a mental link to each other right after we concieved James, it's essential for Time Lord relationships, but Rose," he chuckled, "well, she used to say that she didn't really notice, except sometimes there was this...this _sound_ at the back of her mind, like music."

The Doctor stroked James's cheek softly, "There's only two ways a link can be broken, death is one, the surviving partner usually goes mad."

Donna breathed out softly, "You said there are two ways," she prompted, intrigued despite herself.

He looked up at her, his eyes shiny with unshed tears, "Or the dominant mind could severe it, it's dangerous, it could fail, they would both lose their minds, or they could die, or everything could work perfectly."

"But neither of those happened, did they?"

The Doctor drew back to sit on his haunches, resting his arms and chin on the bed, "No, no, Rose...I lost her." He licked his lips, "She's on a parallel world, there's a barrier between there and here, the link couldn't get through."

"It's like she died? To the link, I mean."

"Yes," he said, turning his eyes to see the plastic glow stars again, "yes, but I didn't realize, I didn't _want _to realize."

"You were going mad," Donna whispered.

"Yes," he acknowledged.

"But you're fine now?"

He smiled up at her, "Yeah, I'm fine." His smile faltered as he brought one long, thin, pale finger up, trailing it down her bruised cheek, "I'm so sorry."

Donna scooched back, "Please, don't," she said.

The Doctor's hand retracted as if burned, "But I _am_ sorry."

Donna closed her eyes, shaking her head, "I _hate_ those words."

"Why?"

She opened her eyes, looking into the Doctor's concerned gaze, "Because Joey used to say he was sorry," she whispered.

A knowing look came into his eyes, he ran a gentle hand over the red hair spread across her pillow, "Donna-"

"No, Doctor, no, just," Donna took a shaky breath, "just leave us alone, please," she begged, "just go."

"I can't, Donna, I can't. I can't leave James again, I promised Rose I'd be with him, that I'd take care of him."

"And suddenly you care about your promises?"

The Doctor closed his eyes as if pained, "I'm sorr-"

"Stop!" Donna cried, shifting over so she was laying on her back, "Please, just stop."

The Doctor looked at her, he grabbed her hand, running his thumb over her knuckles, "Tell me," he urged.

"Tell you what?" she sighed.

He shrugged, "Anything."

Donna turned her head sharply, glaring at him, "Anything?" she echoed.

He nodded.

"When I was sixteen years old I had a boyfriend named Ryan. He'd hit me, I'd come home with bruises and I'd lie to my parents about where they came from. When he told me it was my own fault I believed him," the Doctor flinched, his grip on her hand tightening slightly. "Then a few years later I met Joey, and he did the same bloody thing, but he said he was sorry, that he loved me, and I believed him every single time," Donna struggled to sit up, gasping as she moved her sensitive shoulder. "And Will, when he beat me I knew I deserved better, but I couldn't leave, he used to say he'd kill me if I left. He gave me this," she pulled back her bathrobe, baring her shoulder and the large savage scar there.

"Oh Donna," the Doctor sighed.

"Let me speak," Donna said, leaning back against her wall, her legs spread out on the bed before her, "When Derek hit me I pretended he didn't, because I loved him, I loved him so much. But my Nan noticed the bruises, and all my excuses were useless, Dad and Gramps and Uncle Jimmy came and nearly killed him, they dragged me away screaming."

Without meaning to Donna had begun to cry, large, wet, droplets dripping down her cheeks. "Then there was Rikey, he hit me, but I figured out that I could fight back." She looked at the Doctor, "I stabbed him with a pencil and he left." The Doctor swallowed and crawled onto the bed, sitting opposite Donna, James between them. "And then when Paul came around I knew he would kill me if I fought back, so I waited, I spent months living in the same house as him. When he died of a heroin overdose I thought it was a miracle, I thanked God every single day for years."

The Doctor ran a hand over his mouth, his face pointed down, his eyes closed, "Donna, I didn't know," he stopped and looked up at her, "If I had known-"

"Don't, please don't, I didn't tell you that to make you feel guilty," she leaned forward, resting her palm against his chest, "I told you because I need you to understand that if you ever hit me again I will _never_ forgive you."

The Doctor nodded.

Donna smiled, "And I might stab you."

He laughed, a real guffaw escaping his mouth.

Donna's smile widened, "I'm not joking," she said.

The Doctor looked at her oddly, "So," he drawled, "what are we going to do?" the Doctor asked, easily picking James up. Donna marveled silently at the sight, for so long the Doctor couldn't do much more then _look _at James, and now he was rocking him gently. She still couldn't stop herself from tensing, as if the Doctor might sprint away with her baby.

"What do you want to do?" she asked.

"I want you to come with me," he said, looking up at her through his lashes, "you and James."

"Do you only want me because you want James?"

"No!" he denied at once, he moved closer to her on the bed, "No, Donna," he smiled at her, a soft smile, "you're my friend, and I want you with me."

"You need to understand something though."

The Doctor bit his lip, as if he knew what she was going to say.

"I love James, I've raised him as my son for a long time now," Donna told him quietly, taking the baby from him.

"I know."

"He calls me Mum," she continued.

The Doctor moved restlessly on the bed.

"I _need _him to keep calling me Mum, he's a baby now, he doesn't understand most of what you say, but when he's older and you talk to him about Rose...I can't..." Donna choked up suddenly, remembering his hurtful words at the Lazarus event. "I'm his mother," she insisted, "And I suppose Rose is too, but she's gone, you said she's not coming back, and that leaves me."

"I know, Donna, I know."

Donna sniffled, wiping her hand across her eyes, "Good," she said, "good, let's go see the Tardis and tell my Mum and Grandad. And I'm still angry at you, you have to make it up to me."

Because Donna knew that James was an unearthly child, he was as alien to this world as the Doctor, he didn't belong on Earth, least of all in Chiswick. He belonged in the Tardis, and where he belonged she would make herself belong too. She loved James, her baby boy, and she knew she couldn't raise him the way he was meant to be raised. She was sure that the Doctor would never hurt his son, she was not so sure he would never hurt her, people seemed to be hurt all around him, leaving him unscathed.

She knew it may be a terrible mistake, traveling with this dangerous alien man, but she couldn't say no.

**DISCLAIMER: JUST GIVE THEM TO ME! GIVE THEM TO MEEE!!!**


	19. Chapter 19

**AUTHORS NOTE: Whoo-hoo! I can't wait 'till Thanksgiving (USA version!)! I'm gonna watch the dog show, then I'm gonna eat my delicious dry turkey with enough salt and pepper to kill horse! oh the good times...**

**Anywho, this is sort of cracky, but...well, it was fun to write, plus there's gonna be some darkness in the next chapter. It's gonna be 42 with a few twists!**

The shopping center itself was not actually all that interesting, it looked much like a shopping center on Earth, with shining floors and a food court. But the _people, _oh, the people were fantastic! Donna tried not to stare, with only limited success as she bounced James on her hip, listening to his babbling with only half an ear.

There was a purple (man?) alien eating what looked remarkably like a cheeseburger with his claw like hands, he smiled (she hoped it was a smile) at Donna before she could turn away, showing glowing green teeth and making a choking noise that Donna truly hoped was laughter and not some sort of demented death chant.

There was a small fur ball literally rolling on the floor, squeaking when a foot came too close, when it rolled past James followed it with his eyes, smiling that big goofy grin that always melted Donna's heart. The fur ball stopped and, though it had no eyes, seemed to look up at Donna, it chirped like a happy bird and continued on its way.

There was even a bloody walking and talking _tree! _

This moment was everything Donna thought traveling with the Doctor would be, beautiful and exciting, and just slightly terrifying.

Donna turned to look at Martha, smiling breathlessly, feeling incredibly lightheaded and happy. Martha smiled back, but Donna could tell that Martha was taking this far more in stride then she was, Martha was always grounded. With a start, Donna realized that Martha was conversing with gelatinous blob, the blob sounded quite friendly. _Especially_ friendly to one Martha Jones. Donna tried to listen to their conversation, but found herself staring at the blob instead, smiling a daft smile that wouldn't leave her face.

James seemed to share her intense curiousity, he began reaching out towards the blob, ignoring Donna's restraining hand as he giggled madly. The blob didn't seem to mind.

Donna felt long, cold fongers grace across the small of her back, and then the Doctor was there by her side, smiling down at her. "Hello," he greeted, looking at her, then James, then the blob, then Martha, he stepped towards the blob his hand reached out, like he expected the blob to actually shake it, a moment too late he seemed to realize his foolishness and pretended he was reaching for Martha all along. "Who's this?" he asked, peering at the blob with the same enthusiasm that James had exhibited.

Martha smiled, her big white teeth glinting charmingly under the bright lights, "This is lojisdfj," she said, looking at the blob as if it had all the answers in the universe. Well, Dona thought, what did she know, maybe it did.

The Doctor nodded, joy practically spilling from his pores as he bounced on the balls of his feet, "Brilliant!" he cried, "Donna, Martha, lojisdfj, I've found exactly what we need!" he sprinted away from the group, turning only when he realized they weren't following, he came back, a confused pout building on his face.

"lojisdfj and I were going to check out the music section," Martha explained, already inching away from the Doctor as if he was some overbearing parent hell bent on ruining her good time.

The Doctor deflated slightly, his shoulders curving downward, "oh," he said.

Donna laughed then, still lightheaded, like she wasn't getting enough oxygen, she found almost everything about this situation funny. Martha took the opportunity to skip off with the blob.

The Doctor came and nudged Donna with his shoulder, prompting her to walk next to him. "Not funny," he muttered.

Donna looked at him, nodding, "oh, but it is," she said. She stopped laughing, "Is she going to be alright?" she asked, rembering that she had just let Martha run loose with an alien blob that could very well be made of acid or something.

The Doctor chuckled slightly, "Yes," he said in a tone that seemed to imply that Donna was being ridiculous.

She bristled immedietly, not liking his tone at all, in her books it was known as the 'temps are so stupid they can't tie their shoes' tone, "Oi! He could be planning on eating her or something," she said.

"Eat her?" he repeated, curiousity sticking to his words, "Why would he want to do that?"

Donna rolled her eyes, "Well, I don't know!"

He laughed, careless and free, Donna couldn't help but smile in return, even though she was almost sure he was laughing at her ignorance, it was good to see him so happy. "Don't worry," he said, pulling himself together only slightly, "the worst he could do is ruin her shoes."

His hand gravitated to the small of her back again, steering her through a large doorway, "As I was saying," he said, "there's something I wanted to show you," he said, ducking down under the arms of a very tall, very boistres, very beautiful, very blue, alien woman who grabbed James's attention immediately. Donna really hoped he didn't think all of these aliens were toys.

"What is it?" Donna asked, her eyes wide as she looked about the section they were now in. Wait, why was everything pink and blue and yellow, and was that a pram?

The Doctor didn't answer, he shook his head stubbornly before smiling, he grabbed her hand, dragging her and James further into what Donna could only assume was the childrens section.

After getting lost twice, asking for directions four times, and then being teleported back to the food court somehow, the Doctor dragged her in front of a crib, his chest puffing out proudly, "What do you think?" he asked, nervously shifting from foot to foot.

Donna stood stock still, her eyes roving over the crib slowly, "What is this?" she asked quietly, turning her head to look at the Doctor, not understanding at all.

He rubbed the back of his neck, "It's um...it's a crib."

"Jamie has a crib," Donna said, the image of the harsh metal crib that the Tardis, for some crazy reason, had supplied James with playing in her mind. Donna stepped forward, her hold on James tightening as she ran hand over the hard wood of the impressive crib, "Doctor?" she asked, a strangely vulnerable twinge to her voice even she could hear.

"For James, I...I bought it, the one he has, well, sort of reminds me of a jail," the Doctor said, looking at Donna and James, biting his lip. He walked towards them, curving his hand over James head, "Don't you like it?" he asked, uncertain if he'd done something wrong.

"It's beautiful," she whispered, her fingers tracing the carvings of stars and planets that decorated the wood. She placed James down into it, smiling as he investigated every single inch of it. She swallowed, her throat suddenly dry, _god damn it_, she thought, _I'm crying_. She turned her head away, letting her hair cover her face as she swiped at her eyes.

The Doctor's hand landed on shoulder, "Are you alright?" he asked, his voice strained.

Donna felt very ashamed in that moment, over the last few days he'd been so careful, so gentle around her, begging her forgiveness without actually saying the words, and now she'd gone and made him think he'd hurt her. She lowered her head even more, tears spilling out of her eyes as she bit her knuckles to stop from making too much noise.

The Doctor wrapped his arm around her shoulders, "What's wrong? Donna?" he asked quietly, swiping her hair behind her ear to look at her.

She leaned into the Doctor's embrace, shaking her head, willing herself to get in control as she took a shaky breath, "No, it's perfect."

The Doctor looked as confused as any man could, "Good?" he asked weakly.

Donna nodded fervantly, wiping the tear tracks from her cheeks, "Very good," she agreed shakily.

* * *

"Can I eat that?" Donna asked the Doctor, pointing down at what looked like green cake, ignoring the weird look the alien food court employee gave her.

The Doctor opened his mouth, peered down, and then slowly edged himself, Donna, and James away from the green cake, "No," he said, "you really can't."

Donna accepted that graciously, she walked to the next establishment, she pointed down towards what looked like squid, "How about that?" she asked doubtfully.

He seemed to really think about, "You could," he answered finally.

She raised her eyebrows.

"But I'm pretty sure it would turn your hair brown," the Doctor continued.

Donna's face twisted in a grimace of disgust, eyeing the Doctor's brown hair as if it were alive and would bite her. The Doctor looked mildly affronted in an amused way.

He squinted over Donna's shoulder and smiled, "Martha!" he called, waving dramatically.

Donna turned and gasped in shock, "Martha?!" she cried, pushing her way through the crowd.

Martha smiled from inside the blob, waving her hand lazily through the green slime, "Hello," she said.

* * *

After Martha stepped out of lojisdfj and the Doctor explained to Donna that it was actually a sort of game between humanoids and blobs, very popular during this century, that Donna calmed down.

It didn't stop her from giving Martha a thourough tongue lashing, which included key terms such as 'dangerous' and 'totally irresponsible'.

The blob seemed a little ashamed about scaring Donna so much, he helped them move the crib into the Tardis, then (if it's at all possible) shyly slipped Martha his, well Donna didn't know what it was, but she was pretty sure it equated to a phone number.

It was only after lojisdfj left that Martha realized her cell phone wouldn't be able to call the alien number, then she realized she couldn't call her family, then Donna realized that she couldn't call _her _family either. The Doctor smiled and held out his hadns for their phones, muttering away as he took out his screwdriver.

**DISCLAIMER: If I can't have it no one can! Bwahahahahahahahaha!**


	20. Chapter 20

**Authors Note: Wow, okay, havn't postedd in a while, but that's only because I took a nap. That's right, I took a seven month nap.**

As soon as the Doctor pointed his screwdriver at Donna Noble's phone, as soon as he soniced it, it started blaring a semi-familair, semi-annoying song.

He turned it back over to Donna, an almost disgusted look on his face, as if he'd never expect her to actually get a phone call. She answered it, without even glancing to see who it was. "Yeah?" she barked, turning her back to the Doctor and Martha, running a gentle hand over James's hair as she walked by his crib. The suspicious look in Donna's eyes slowly dimmed, her smile grew wider as she seemed to recognize the voice on the other side, "Yeah, I've been travelling around."

Martha shared an amused glance with the Doctor as he handed her own phone, "She's a popular one," she whispered.

The Doctor smiled at Martha, walking over to James's crib, he patted his sons head softly, ruffling his hair affectionately, "Yeah, suppose so."

"Wha?" Donna asked into phone, laughing heartily, she threw her head back and practically yelled down the phone, "Who has? Riley?"

Martha shook her head, eyebrows rising as she looked down at her silent phone. She looked up and smiled shyly at the Doctor, "I'm sure someone will call me soon, yeah?"

"He did not! You're such a liar!" Donna said, looking confused for a moment, shaking her head forcefully. She walked to the far side of the console, leaning back against it. "Died? When did he do that? What, stabbed right down at the pub? Which pub? Oh no, did he die right there?"

Martha's raised her eyebrows, looking entirely too shocked, she turned to look at the Doctor, who didn't look so much shocked as concerned as he leaned forward at a crazy angle, thinking he was sneakily eavesdropping.

"Well, thank god for that. Imagine if he'd died there, Alice would be on about his ghost every bloody time we went for drinks," Donna cackled, stomping her trainer clad foot on the grating. "Saw it coming though, oh, what? You weren't thinking the exact same thing?"

The Doctor was looking more than just mildly concerned now, he appeared to be observing Donna like one would someone they'd never met before. As if he was only now realizing that Donna Noble had an entire life that had nothing to do with him, friends and family that lived and died and never knew the name Doctor. He picked James up, cuddling the child against him as he walked slowly to the console. But Donna didn't notice, she didn't seem to have a care in the world and continued her conversation, her loud, clear voice carrying across the Tardis. "Oh, shut it, I ain't the one who stuck him, am I?" Donna put her hand out in front of her, studying her painted red nails with a shrug. She chuckled quietly, "Might have, you're right. He was such a chav, wonder if he was wearing that burberry cap when they put him in the ground."

The Doctor peered at Donna through lowered lashes as he pulled a few levers, only seeing a fraction of her face as she frowned thoughtfully.

"How's his mum?" Donna asked, quietly, like the question was something that had been bothering her. "Yeah," she said into the phone, "she's still got that little girl, what's her name? Marie? At least she's not alone."

The Doctor caught sight of Donna's lowered gaze and saddened lips before she fell roughly to the down to the ground, a clanging bell sounding across the Tardis. The Doctor stayed on his feet by some miracle and clutched James close against him, "It's a distress signal," he realized, "hang on!"

Donna's voice sounded up from the floor, she still had the phone to her ear, "I've got to go, I'll ring ya later." Her head tilted to the side and the Doctor knew she was about to lie, "Yeah, a car accident, no ones hurt though, Bye." And then she popped up, only her face and hair visible, as she was still sitting on the floor. She looked accusatorily up at the Doctor, "Doctor?"

He looked down at her, "Ah, sorry, not my fault, a distress signal, there are people, people, ah, in distress." His gaze shifted from Donna to Martha, "Lots and lots of distress."

But after only a moment the Tardis stopped shaking, its flight leveled out and the clanging bell became quiet.

Martha looked down, confused at the console, her hands still clutching at the edge, "What are we doing?" she asked. "Have we landed?"

The Doctor shook his head, smiling easily, "Nah, of course not."

"But aren't we going to help them? The distress signal, aren't we gonna help?"

"We did," he rounded the console, giving Donna a helping hand in standing up. "I advanced their signal, everyone in that half of the galaxey will hear them. The authorities will be with them in half a minute."

Donna took James from the Doctor's grip, balancing the child on her hip, "Well good," she said, smiling up at the Doctor, her eyes crinkling with warmth, "can't go running around now anyway, Jamie needs a nap. Now come on, that crib isn't gonna move itself. Let's go!"

The Doctor smiled a big goofy grin as Donna barked orders at him, like he didn't enjoy anything in the world as much as Donna telling him what to do. He cracked his knuckles, throwng his head back in what he thought was a manly fashion and moved to move the crib.

**DISCLAIMER: WHY? Oh why has thoust forsaken me? WHY did Catherine Tate and David Tennent have only one year together on my TV? Did they not make you happy?**


	21. Chapter 21

**AUTHORS NOTE: teeny tiny chapter filled with Donna and Martha friendship...aw, ain't it sweet. guess what's coming up? human nature and family of blood, yay!**

Donna tilted her head critically, puckering her lips in thought, "No," she whispered, turning away, ignoring a thouroughly disgruntled Martha.

"But you picked it!" Martha called, turning to walk back into the fitting room, she looked in the store mirror again, smoothing the front of the dress down.

Donna ran her hands over the clothes rack, muttering quietly, "It's definately the right color, but, ugh god, that cut is just dreadful. Body like that," she pulled a dress from the rack, rubbing the clingly material between her fingers, "best show it off."

"Donna, should I put this back on the hanger?"

"Yeah, we're definately not wearing that thing again," Donna called, throwing the new dress over the fitting room door, "try this on."

There was a moment of silence from the fitting room before the door was opened wide, exposing Martha clad in only her knickers, "You want me to wear this!" she asked, scandalized beyond belief.

Donna raised her eyebrows, crossing her arms as she looked Martha's body up and down, "Well hello there," she purred, smirking as Martha hurriedly held the dress over herself.

Martha's entire face flushed, but she apparently decided the best course of action was to ignore the fact she'd just flashed Donna her girly bits, "I can't wear this," she said, plucking at the dress as she closed the door.

"Why not? It covers everything that needs covering, doesn't it?" Donna asked, sneaking a glance or two from between the slats in the door. "What are you doing?" she asked, frowning as she saw Martha changing back into her own clothes, "just try it on, it'll fit like a glove, you dumbo!"

"Exactly!"

"If I had a body like yours," Donna sighed, shaking her head, leaning her full weight against the doorframe, her hands bracing her on either side.

"This body doesn't do quite as much as you think it does," Martha said irritably from inside the room.

"And who are we talking about exactly, that nice bloby boy who keeps calling, or the oblivious doctor man?" Donna called, pushing herself away from the doorframe.

Donna could hear Martha's smile as she spoke, "That 'nice bloby boy' has a name, Donna, it would be nice if you used it."

"I would if I could," Donna said quietly, sliding down to the floor to sit crosslegged in front of the door. "So, what happened? Did he compare you to a nice bloby girl, do they have blob girls?" Donna asked, plucking at the dark carpet, observing the chipped paint, "Did he find you lacking? Are you not bloby enough? Not enough junk in the trunk?"

"Donna!"

"Oh alright, tell me then!"

Martha sighed, her outtake of breath barely audible over the sound of her leather jacket being pulled on, "He just can't relate, we're so different. He gets frustrated."

"Not just him I think," Donna said, her eyebrows raising.

"Yeah," Martha opened the door, clad in her regular clothes, dark trousers and a black leather coat, she reached down and helped Donna up from the ground.

Donna smiled at her, wrapping a long arm around Martha's shoulders, "Come on, let's see what trouble the Doctor and Jamie have gotten in the middle of. I swear, those boys, trouble follows them everywhere." Donna smiled at the sales um...being at the till as they exited the shop and stepped out into the brightly lit alien world.

The trouble it seemed, was having a deadly family of immortality seekers chasing them through the streets of Tyuip and then through time itself.

**DISCLAIMER: Wha? *SplutterSplutter* You mean I _don't _own Doctor who? What an outrage!**


	22. Chapter 22

**AUTHORS NOTE: Please, please review! I don't like updating if no one has reviewed at all! It makes me paranoid that no one is really out there and that I live in a bubble or maybe i'm rocking back and forth in an insane asylum, but then if this was my imagination I'd be rich, incredibly beautiful, and be best friends with catherine tate and be going out with that guy from work...hmmm. so please review.**

"You're gonna turn yourself human?" Donna shrieked, flailing her long arms violently. "Are you mad? You can't just change species when you hit a rough patch!"

The Doctor spun around on his heel, looking Donna in the eyes before he turned back to the Tardis controls, "Look, Donna, I _can _turn human, I'm not mad, and it's the only way to escape." He made a sort of hand gesture that said 'that's the end of it.'

Donna shook her head stepping forward even as an odd contraption lowered itself from the ceiling and hovered between her and the Doctor. "What about us?" she shrieked, gesturing at Martha and the alarmed child in her arms, "What about the Tardis?"

"The Tardis understands the situation, alright? She'll wiggle you and Martha and James into my human memory," the Doctor looked up at her, a tenderness in his expression as he reached forward to grasp her upper arms reassuringly, "I'm not leaving you," he said.

Donna took in a heavy breath, looking up into the Doctor's big brown eyes. He blinked in shock as he saw the fear in her eyes, the uncertainty, all her bluster and anger just to hide it. He drew her forward wrapping thin arms around her, even going as far as to run a gentle hand over the ginger tresses falling down her back when he felt her wrap her own arms around him. He leaned his head down, murmering softly in her ear, her bangs tickling his cheek, "It's all going to be fine, three months, that's all. Me and you and the Tardis, just like-"

"and Martha and James," she cut in quietly.

"Me and you and Martha and James and the Tardis, just like it should be, I promise."

Donna took a shuddering breath, tightening her grasp on him, like she was terrified he wasn't even there, "Okay."

He drew back, smiled at her before moving to embrace Martha and James in a group hug with murmered encouragments. And slowly, as if it were an execution, he made his way to the contraption hanging from the ceiling. He smiled again, the sort of a smile a ten year old would give you when he's trying to be brave, and pulled the machine over his head.

Donna, already cose to tears, began to sob as he began to scream. She took James from Martha and sat solidly on the floor, curling as best she could as James began to scream and cry.

* * *

John Smith was a complete and utter bastard, and Donna hated him with a passion. Which was really quite unfortunate because the Tardis had decided to make Donna Noble into Donna Smith, the wife of John Smiths estranged and recently dead brother.

It was necessary for the Tardis to write the fictional life of Frank Smith out in English so Donna would be able to talk about him to John, which they did with alarming frequency. Frank Smith was John's senior by two years, he was tall and thin with dark hair and dark eyes, the Tardis told her that when the boys were growing up people thought John and Frank were twins. Frank was adventurous and a trouble maker, he was quickwitted and clever, he had more friends then a person could count, and he loved every single one. He went to school to become a doctor, he met Donna on Christmas and, according to the Tardis, fell in love with her immedietly. They promptly moved to Australia and had many adventures, including bringing James Smith into the world.

The fictional Frank Smith seemed, at his very core, to be the Doctor, except for the one detail of him being madly in love with Donna.

It was considerate of the Tardis, to do that, it meant Donna could talk about the Doctor, even if she had to replace the words 'Tardis' with 'Ship' and 'Space' with 'Australia'.

* * *

John Smith looked across the table, "I'm glad you're here, Donna," he smiled at her.

She smiled at him, a small smile that didn't show her teeth.

"You're not exactly qualified for the librarian position, of course," he said, ignoring her glare, "But I told them you were family, and that does do a bit, doesn't it?" he asked smugly. He looked over his paper at her, observing her, his eyes lingering on the red tresses that always seemed to escape her bun, "I still miss him," he said quietly.

She looked up at him, confusion apparent in her blue eyes, "Who?" she asked, absentmindedly holding a biscuit to her infant son.

"Well, Frank of course," John said, looking at Donna in concern.

"oh, yes, I-" Donna paused, looking down at the lace tablecloth, she looked back up at John, "Yes, so do I."

"He loved you so very much, Donna," John continued, looking down at his paper, not noticing the way Donna blanched and didn't touch her food. "The day he met you he told me 'I've met the woman of my life, she's beautiful and kind and ginger too!'" John Smith chuckled, "You made my brother a lucky man."

"No," she said, smiling sadly, "I was the lucky one," Donna stared at John Smith, wishing that he would turn into a different man, a man with the same face but an entirely different name. She drew James into her lap, nuzzling her chin against his hair as Martha walked in, a days worth of clean washing held in her arms.

"Hello Mr. Smith, Mrs. Smith," she said, nodding at Donna only, smiling at her in a weary way.

"Hello Martha, how are you?" Donna asked.

"I'm very well, thank you ma'am," she said.

Martha turned to leave, but Donna called out, "Wait! I'll walk with you," she stood, depositing Jamie on John's lap as she stood to leave, John looked up at her in confusion.

"Donna?"

"I'll see you later, John." Donna smiled at him before making her exit.

When they were far enough away from his rooms, Donna stopped walking and stood solidly still, tapping her toe impatiently and looked at Martha with look that very plainly said 'spill the beans.'

Martha sighed, rolled her eyes, before smiling like a lovelorn puppy, "It's lojisdfj! He told me he loved me!"

Donna's head tilted to the side, she looked at Martha like she was crazy, "Martha," she said seriously, "have you gone mad?"

"What?"

"You've only met him in person _once, _everything else has been over the phone, you can't honestly believe he loves you. He doesn't even _know _you!"

"You just dont understand!" Martha hissed, turning and walking away moodily.

Donna looked affronted, which was understandable, because she was, "Fine then!" she called to Martha's back, "Just trying to give you some damn advice, you bloody bint!"

* * *

"Hi, gramps," Donna whispered into her phone as she curled up on her side, drawing her blankets around her shoulders.

"Hello, my girl!" Wilf cried, "How are you, love? Haven't heard from you, I've been worried," he said, only somewhat serious, she could tell.

"I can't really say, grandad," Donna whispered.

"Why are you whispering? You're not in danger, are you sweetheart?" Wilf asked, sounding suddenly nervous, Donna could just imagine him standing up, as if he could leap through the phone and save her from anything.

"No," she breathed, "Nothing like that, grandad, it's late here, is all. Neighbors trying to sleep and all that."

Wilf took in a breath, "Where are you?"

"I-" Donna sighed, "That's a longer story then you know gramps," she laughed quietly, "How are you and Mum? Getting along?"

"Oh," he grumbled, "she's got me on this diet thing again."

Donna smiled as she listened to her grandfather, immensly glad that she'd allowed the Doctor to upgrade her phone, she couldn't imagine being trapped in 1913 without being able to talk to her family. It was a link to Donna's real world, the Doctor's world, Donna kept her cell phone with her always, no matter the danger of it being found or ringing at an inopurtune time.

* * *

Donna would hike her way to the old barn to see the Tardis whenever she could, she knew Martha did the same.

She'd walk in the door, smell the familair scent, stroke the central console tenderly and walk about the halls for as long as she could.

It was a complicated sort of comfort, the ship was familair, was Donna's home, but it was deserted, it was bittersweet.

* * *

"Here you go," John Smith said, smiling at Donna as he handed her a glass filled with some unnamed liquid.

She smiled at him, "Thank you," she said, taking a small sip of the drink, frowning when she realized it wasn't alcohal.

"This is excellent, don't you think?" John said, smiling at his assembled collegues.

"Yeah," Donna grumbled, holding her drink at chest level, glaring out at the pompous men and sniveling woman that occupied the well furnished room.

John looked down at her, frowning that really annoying frown, "You could sound a tad more appreciative, they are paying your wages after all."

Donna rolled her eyes.

"Donna, act like a lady," John said, grumbling in the way arrogant men do.

Donna huffed out a breath, sweeping her bangs, which, even though they were unfashionable this decade, Donna absolutely refused to go without, aside and turned on her heel, stalking away from John. She could feel his eyes on her the rest of the night.

* * *

Martha ran into the Tardis control room, where she'd been before who knew, it was a very big ship. Martha's held her phone in her hand, sad little tears were running down her cheeks. She threw herself down on the jump seat, her shoulders shaking.

Donna let out a tiny sigh as she looked up from the Tardis controls, watching Martha for just a moment before walking over to her side, "So what did the blob do this time?" Donna asked, rubbing Martha's shaking back soothingly.

Martha hiccuped and shot Donna a nasty glare, "His name is lojisdfj, Donna," she gave a little sob and buried her face back in her hands.

"Alright what did loji-lojidf, ugh," Donna said, deciding to give up on the blobs name for now, "what did he do? That's who you were on the phone with, wasn't it?"

"He-he said I should't call him anymore!" Martha cried, turning and flinging her thin arms around Donna's neck, sobbing plaintively against Donna's shoulder.

Donna wrapped her arms around Martha's back, patting comfortingly, "That wasn't all, was it? Did he give a reason?" she asked, rolling her eyes only slightly.

Martha sniffed, and Donna was sure some snot was now on her shoulder, great, "He-he said he loves me too much to keep stringing me alone."

"What?" Donna asked, very confused but not really caring.

"He's-" Martha sobbed uncontrolably for a few moments, "He's getting married!" she shrieked.

Donna's mothering and protective instincts went completely and utterly _insane _at that point, "He what?" she screamed. She tore herself away from Martha, holding her at arms length to talk to her properly, "He's getting married? But talking to you anyway?"

Martha nodded sadly.

"He's just stringing you along, making you care about him, but he was never gonna do anything, he was never-" Donna stood, stomping her way to the controls and flipping switches angrily. "Stupid blob, I'm going to tear that piece of acidic crap to bits," she muttered, "pretty girl and he's playing her like-"

Martha ran up behind Donna, practically jumping on her to stop her from her mission of tearing the acidic piece of crap to bits. "No, please don't! Please, just sit with me, please."

Donna closed her eyes, swallowing her anger as she turned and wrapped Martha up in her long arms.

* * *

"And then, the idiot Londoner jumped right off his horse!" Mr. Willows said, cackling like a Bond villian with a cigerette between his lips, he grabbed John's shoulder as he leaned forward, "London is just filled with idiots, don't you think?"

Donna turned sharply, almost spilling her drink, she looked first at John, who was nodding, then at Mr. Willows, "Excuse me?" she asked.

John's head shot up, looking at her with a guilty expression, "ah, Donna, we were just speaking-"

"London isn't what is used to be, Donna, may I call you Donna? It's filled with street urchins and woman of the night," Mr. Willows said, his eyes starting out on her face and then slowly drifting down.

Donna rolled her eyes, "London," she said, "is a national treasure, every street, every brick has more history then-"

Mr. Willows smiled at Donna, a very insulting smile that seemed to say 'you're very stupid, stop speaking.' He turned to John, chuckling, "She's fiery, isn't she?" he reached out and curled a bit of Donna's hair about his finger, "Can't expect better from gingers though."

John grabbed Mr. Willows and took a long step back, "It was nice talking to you Donna," he said in a rush, "but we really should be going, good bye!" he yelled as he and Mr. Willows exited the room.

* * *

"Oi!" Donna screamed, throwing the heaviest book she could find at John Smith's head, "Get up, you useless git!"

His eyes snapped open, and he took a deep breath, he sat bolt upright in his bed, glaring at Donna as he rubbed his sore head, "I don't think I'll mention how entirely improper it is for a lady to-"

"Oh, get off!" Donna seethed, crossing her arms as she strode around John's couch, to stand directly in front of his bed, glaring down at him. "What did you say to Professor Pickle?" she asked, her voice dangerously low.

"Professor what?" he asked, drawing his blankets towards him like a squimish girl.

"That _old,_ leery Professor who's always trying to touch my breasts," Donna said.

"Really Donna," John sighed, "his name is Professor Pikurle-"

"Like that's any better," Donna mumbled.

"-and that incident with the-the-"

"Groping?" Donna supplied.

"-was a complete accident."

Donna took another step forward, leaning down towards John Smith, "He told me that he had _your_ permission to take me on a picnic tomorrow, John Smith."

John opened his mouth and looked away from her, "Well, yes, Donna, he really does fancy you, it might do you good, to move on, and he's quite a wealthy man," he said weakly.

Her finger came up, pointing at him, inches from his nose, "I don't care if he's the richest bloody man in the whole of Britain, you have _no right_ to tell anyone they can take me anywhere."

His head spun around, looking up at her with earnest eyes, "Of course I do, Donna, your father is dead, you husband is dead, what kind of woman would you be if you didn't have a man to guide you in this world?" Donna could tell that he thought he was speaking the absolute honest truth.

Donna slaped him, much harder then was probably necessary and walked out the door as he spluttered in outrage.

* * *

"He draws you," Martha said, smiling sadly as she slumped down on the couch Donna had moved into the control room.

"What?" Donna said, idly studying the Tardis console.

Martha tore her dreary and boring shoes off her feet, turning on her side, her hands tucked against her chin, "John Smith, he's got this journal, he writes about his dreams. About the Doctor."

Donna stroked the Tardis control as she went towards Martha, "That makes sense though, doesn't it?" she asked, kneeling down by the couch, adjusting her ungainly floor length skirts as she looked into Martha's dark eyes, "I am John Smith's 'poor widowed sister in law'."

"Yeah, and I'm his servant," Martha added bitterly.

"Hey," Donna admonished gently.

"He draws you and Rose, he dreams about you and Rose," Martha whispered, sniffling against her sleeve.

"Yeah, well what else does he draw, it's not just a whole notebook of us, is it?" Donna asked, resting her arms and chin on the couch, "Come on, what else?"

Martha smiled sadly, "You and Rose, with Jamie in between."

Donna rolled her eyes as she stood, "I've got to go back, can't have poor Jenny watching Jamie for me all day." Donna pulled pulled her coat from under Martha and shrugged it on, frowning at Martha's moppiness as she walked across the grated floor, exiting the through the Tardis doors.

When Donna made it back to the school she could hear James giggling as soon as she neared her rooms, she took a moment to lean against the door, her ear pressed against the wood, smiling wistfully. She pushed the door open with a flourish, beaming at Jenny and James, "I can hear you from across the village," she joked, throwing her wool coat on her bed before she kicked off her terribly bleak shoes.

Jenny, who had been chasing James as he crawled around the room, bowed her head only slightly, "Sorry," she said, not sounding sorry in the least.

"How was he? Not too good?" Donna asked, sweeping across the floor, her skirt whirling around her ankles as she whisked James up into the air, lifting him above her head. James laughed, reaching down to grab Donna's nose as he wiggled in her grasp.

"Of course not, he's a little monster," Jenny said, hands resting on her hips, grinning madly. "And very smart, if I may be so bold."

Donna smiled at her, "Oh, go on, be bold," she mock whispered, twirling on her toes as James told her to 'dance'.

Jenny lowered herself onto the only chair in Donna's room, following Donna's form as she spun about the room, James giggling in her arms. "Your hair's come undone," Jenny warned, gesturing at Donna's red hair, which was in fact falling semi freely about her shoulders, "and such pretty hair it is."

"You're wonderful for my ego," Donna laughed. She sashayed towards Jenny, her hand outreached, "Dance with us," she urged, grabbing Jenny's hand, forcing her from her chair.

Jenny looked sheepish, "There's no music," she offered meekly, letting Donna guide her into the center of the smallish room.

Donna leaned towards Jenny, "_Today I might not have a thing at all," _she sang, a surprisingly melodic voice escaping her lips, _"Except for just a dream or two." _Donna twirled Jenny about, holding James on her hip, "_But I've got lots of plans for tomorrow, and all my tomorrows belong to you."_

Jenny laughed as she surrendred herself to the tune and whisked around the room with surprising grace.

"_Right now it may not seem like spring at all, we're drifting and laughs are few," _Donna closed her eyes as she sang, turning in a slow circle, smiling as James seemed to sway with the slow tune of the song. "_But I've got rainbows planned for tomorrow, and all my tomorrows belong to you,"_ Donna sang, singing to James, James who owned all her tomorrows. "_No one knows better then I that luck keeps passing me by that's-"_

"What is going on here?" a voice screeched from the doorway, making poor Jenny falter and almost fall as she spun around.

Donna opened her eyes slowly, glaring at the woman in the threshold, "Nurse," she said tersely, "how are you?"

Joan Redfern smoothed her skirts, looking at Donna and Jenny as if they were bugs, "Mrs. Smith," she said coldly, "might I remind you that this is a residential area? Is it not enough that we endure your son," she hissed, glaring at the child in question, "we must endure your horrendous screaming as well?"

Jenny took a step forward, "She has a beautiful voice, Nurse Redfern."

"No one asked you, Jenny, now why don't you run off, I believe Baines and his cohorts have muddied up the floor on the main level again."

Jenny looked back at Donna only once as she hurried from the room, eyes drifting to the floor, shoulders drooping under Nurse Redfern's supiority. Nurse Redfern stepped further into Donna's room, chin raised, "You would do well to find a better class of friends, Mrs. Smith," she said, in a poor attempt at friendliness. "What would your late husband think? Parading about with the help, Professor Smith is too embarrased to say anything."

Donna placed James on the floor, smiling as he crawled away from Joan Redfern, "John is perfectly accepting of my social circles, Nurse Redfern," Donna said, relishing in the knowledge that the nurse was silently seething at Donna's ability to say John Smith's first name.

"If you're so much more comfortable with the maids, maybe you should change professions?" the nurse said, "You never did strike me as a librarian, Mrs. Smith, not enough learning."

Donna hummed quietly through her nose in displeasure, her time as Mrs. Smith, the widowed wife of Frank Smith, teaching her to hold her tongue. Nurse Redfern, suddenly uncomfortable, backed out of the room, "I'll see you on Monday, Mrs. Smith, it seems I have a number of books I must return to the library."

"Very good, Nurse Redfern," Donna said, closing the door even before Joan was completely through the door.

Donna turned, resting her back against the wood, her hand still on the doorknob, watching silently as James crawled across the floor. Gravity pulled her downward, she slid down until she was sitting, her long skirts pooled around her.

James looked at her for a moment, intelligent blue eyes peeking out from the infants face, he crawled to her, sat on her lap and pulled her ginger hair, "Mum," he said.

**DISCLAIMER: Doctor who and that song (sung by the great Frank Sinatra) do not belong to me, unfortunately neither does my house, my cat, or my soul. How very, very sad.**


	23. Chapter 23

**Authors Note: Have you ever been so angry that you want to destroy everything in the whole world and kill everyone? No? Well it sure jump starts the creative process, I tell you that.**

Donna stole John Smith's journal one day. How could she not?

She hid herself and James away in the Tardis and sat down to read. But reading had never been Donna's favorite thing in the world, and there really was quite alot of text for a journal that had only been in operation for less then two months. So 'read' was really more like 'flip through looking at the drawings', at least for about the first half of the journal.

She stopped to read when she saw the first drawing of herself.

_Donna dressed in white, she is a bride._

Donna smiled slightly.

_Her groom is an awful man, a man who does not love her. Awful. _

Donna turned the page, her upper lip rising in distaste as she saw the drawing of the Racnoss spider with Lance by its side. She flipped some more pages, stopping when a picture called to her. One drawing stopped her cold, a drawing of herself and James crumpled on the ground surrounded by darkness. John Smith added red ink to the drawing here, something he hadn't done on any of the other pages. The red ink is blood, and it seems to seep from under Donna and James, it drips from Donna's nose, seeps out of her clearly broken jaw. The drawing was horrible and horrific and Donna turned her eyes up to read the lines above it.

_Broken on the ground like rag dolls Fate no longers deems to play with. They bleed, red soaking into the darkness, at first sight I feared they no longer lived. _

_The sound of their harsh breathing, as beautiful as any symphony, is as wonderous as a boat is to a drowning man._

_(Drowning, drowning without them. Pulled in by the untempered rage.)_

Donna turned the page with a frown and a shake of her head.

A drawing of James.

_In life he is the son of my brother, but in my dreams he is **my **son. He is always held secure in Donna's arms, through all of time and space she holds him and keeps him safe, and it is hard to think she is not his mother. Surely my dreams are mistaken, Rose (lovely Rose), is she James's mother in my dreams? James resembembles Donna so closely I know for certain that she is his mother. His eyes are blue, but shaped like my own. His hair is a dark shade of red, yet has the shape of texture of my own. His grin though, he gets all from me, I think._

Donna looked over at James playing with his favorite toys, the toys that came from Donna's time, the cheap plastic ones. There were things in James that he most definately did not get from the Doctor, and Donna had always assumed they came from his mother, Rose. The shape of his jaw, the swoop of his nose, and most definately those dumbo ears, because the Doctor had perfectly fine ears (Donna had checked). She flipped a few more pages.

There was a drawing of herself, she was smiling with her hair blowing in the wind.

_Donna smiles at me in my dreams, smiles that steal my very breath away._

_Smiles that say, you are my dearest friend. __Smiles that say, you are free to travel where you please and I will be beside you._

_Smiles that say, grab my hand. __She smiles, such smiles that I have never seen in the waking world._

_She smiles and I am filled with the knowledge that I am the Doctor and I have lived a thousand years and seen a thousand worlds._

_When she smiles I wish to never wake up, I feel it too when Rose smiles at me. If only my dream girls would appear together and I would never have to choose. __(They never appear together, these two mothers.)_

_I wonder if Donna smiled at my brother in such a way? Is that how she stole his heart so completely? Did her smile make him strong enough to travel across the seas? (What could I do with the strength of her smile?)_

Donna took a deep breath and closed the book for a little while. She had never considered John Smith as a real person, had never even thought he might have thoughts, let alone _feelings_.

She decided to find a drawing of Rose and did so with little difficulty. The drawing was not complete, but you could see her face, her long hair.

_Time War. Time War. Time War. And then Rose. (Long blonde hair, she will cut her hair.)_

_Rose, young and free and innocent. Like a child._

_So much life._

Donna flipped forward to find a later drawing.

_She looks at me like she does not know me (I do not know myself)._

_Her love is being tested, will she fail? Don't fail. Don't fail. Please don't fail me._

_The world is blurry, words do not fit my tongue. So much hair._

Donna flipped forward.

_Rose, the most beautiful creature, sleeping after giving birth to my son. Oh, a darling, healthy boy._

_I was afraid for them both, dying, almost dying. If I had to save one..._

_She told me to save the boy. I would have saved her though. Save her. I need to save her._

_(Trapped without her son. How will I raise him alone?)_

Donna flipped forward and found a drawing of the crib the Doctor had bought for James, the crib he had bought to show her how much he loved his son.

_In my dreams I must work hard to win Donna's trust. I hurt her, not as badly as those before I think, but enough to bruise her face. Her pale face. A mistake, a sickness, I said I was sorry and I was, I was so sorry. I feel my sorrow now, my disbelief when I realized what I had done. __They were all sorry too, she said. I will not be like those that have come before, I would do anything to prove that I was her friend. I think I remember now..._

_Her screams as we fall down the stairs, so loud, the crunch as we hit the bottom. I never wish to hear her scream. I never wish to hear her bones breaking._

_I am the Doctor and I would do anything she asked. I am the Doctor and I would never hurt her. I am the Doctor and I would climb from the pits of hell to walk beside her. I am the Doctor and I wish to hold her hand._

Donna closed the book.

**DISCLAIMER: Honestly I don't think the Journal of Impossible Things said any of this stuff. Buuuuuut, if it did, sorry, not intentional...**

**or...was it?**


	24. Chapter 24

**AUTHORS NOTE: My goddamned brother and his 'constructive critisicm', god I hate that guy.**

Donna held the nearly empty liquor bottle to her lips and began to drunkenly slur some words to a song that wouldn't be written for another ninety years, she did this as she climbed atop a table.

"Donna, get down," Martha cackled, holding her own bottle close to her chest, "Donna, you stupid cow!" Martha tripped over her own feet and went crashing to the floor, plomping down with no grace and little embarresment.

"It's as if I'm scared, it's as if I'm terrifiiiieeeed!" Donna screeched, swishing her hips to the beat only she could hear and ignoring the catcalls of the drunk men who watched her like one would a terribly rare natural wonder. "Scared, playing with fire...dababa, Relax! Take it E-e-saay!"

Martha sat up giggling, "You don't even know the words," she said.

Jenny came forward tutting her tongue as she wrapped her hands around Martha's arms, "Up you get," she said with infinite patience. Once she had plied Martha off the floor she went to stand in front of Donna's table, "Donna," she said, her voice serious and unamused, "get off that table."

Donna pointed down at Jenny and winked, "For there is nothing that we can do," she crooned to her bottle, "Relax, take it E-e-saaaaay!"

"Come on, off you get," Jenny said, holding a hand up to Donna with a weary expression. When Donna did not listen to Jenny, Jenny decided to take a more forceful route, "Donna!" she screamed, hand on her hip, "Get off that table now or I will have John Smith come down here to get you off!" she threatened.

Martha giggled at Jenny's side, "Get him down here to get Donna off," she mumbled, pointing vaguely at Donna, "get you off, Donna, did you hear?"

Donna giggled with Martha, than began to laugh in earnest when she saw Jenny's confused face, "I don't want to have sex with him, Jenny, that-" she swayed to the left and almost fell of the table, "that is so silly. Y-you silly cow. He-he's just so skinny, skinny like a rat, like a little animal," Donna laughed, her head tipping from side to side in an uncoordinated manner, "do ya think he's skinny all over? Like, ya know what I mean?" She leaned forward and cupped her chin in her hand, "I-I'm talking about his penis, what do you think his penis is like?"

"You could find out, ginger!" a drunk called from the bar.

"_You _could find out, bender!" Donna called back.

After a small competition of wit with the drunk man, which Donna won, she turned to talk to Jenny again. She blinked, "Jenny? What about his penis?"

Jenny let out a mortified squeek.

Donna waved a blase hand, "But yeah, so skinny, Martha? Martha, do you- do you still want to play with him? Some, some fun is never too bad. Oh but not John Smith, John Smith, I hate that guy."

"The lady doth protest too much," a drunk at the next table said, chuckling as he made rude gestures at Donna, which she returned with relish. There was a loud crack as Donna began to jump up and down on the rickity table, and then suddenly the table and Donna were on the floor. Donna blinked slowly and looked at the remains of the table and almost began to cry.

Martha wobbled over to her and sat on the ground next to her, "oh, Donna, that doesn't mean your fat. That...could have hap-happened to anyone!"

Donna wrapped her long arms around Martha's shoulders, "That's n-not why, why I'm sad. The table, yeah, the table, it was so," Donna shook her head, "it was so not well made. I could jump on tables back home all I want, you, you know? Do you know, yeah? And they're bolted to the wall and they don't fall down."

"You're, you are so right. God, Donna you are always _so _right," Martha said, smiling and squeezing Donna happily.

Jenny tapped her toe impatiently, "Get off the floor," she said, her tone as demanding as it had ever been in her life, "Get off that dirty floor, right now!" Donna and Martha used each other to levy the other up and stood giggling before Jenny. Jenny sighed and grabbed one of Donna's hands and one of Martha's, she dragged them towards the door. "I can't believe you always talk me into coming here! And why cook agrees to watch James, I'll never know," she hissed as they entered the coat room. "I never even knew of this place before you showed up."

"Oh, Jenny," Martha slurred as Jenny helped her put on her hat.

Donna tugged on her coat, "Jenny, Jenny, gorgeous Jenny," she said as she skipped around Jenny, "that's so sad, you-you didn't know about this place? The only decent place to get a drink in all of nineteen thirteen?" She took a step towards her friend and pressed and indignant finger to her chest, "-hard it was to find this place? I, looked everywhere," she said with a grand gesture, "everywhere, and they was saying nah you're a woman, or nah she's black or whatever and I was all over it, I was using my skills, I'm a-a sumper, a super I mean, a super temp."

Jenny rolled her eyes as she made sure all the girls had all their buttons done up and bundled them all out the door.

"aaahhhh," Donna moaned pathetically, "It's so cold! It's always cold, no central heat, even, even estates have heat."

Martha stumbled next to her, "Cars have heat too," she muttered in agreement.

"Cars!" Donna screamed, "Or the Underground, none of this _ridiculous _walking, walking here, walking there, w-walking everywhere. It's torture! Like waterboarding or bambo sticks up the fingernails or something. The UN should ban," Donna stumbled, "ban it. Geneva convention or whatever, right? Girls, yeah? Let's write um an E-mail."

Jenny held their hands like they were children and led them down the dark path that would take them back to the school, "You talk such nonsense when you drink!"

Donna shook her head, "_You _talk nonsense when I drink!" she accussed.

"You act like barbarians, I swear, what kind of woman gets drunk, not me, which is why," Jenny turned her head to glare at them, "it is so inconsiderate when you fools go and behave like this."

Donna began to giggle and skip, forcing Jenny to follow as she held her hand in a vice grip.

"I'm really very mad at you," Jenny said.

Donna swung their hands in a wide arch and then almost fell into the muddy ditch that lined the road.

Jenny smiled despite herself and laughed.

Donna gasped and smiled up at the sky as manuevered to be the one between Martha and Jenny, her arms wrapped around both their shoulders, "It's a shooting star, ain't that somethi-" then she threw up all over her shoes.

**DISCLAIMER: Even though I am watching Star Trek: Next Generation, my heart will always belong to Doctor Who (I don't own either, although if I could own one and had to choose it would be a tough choice, two good red headed actresses there.)**

**Who am I kidding? Catherine tate all the way, seriously, jeez.**


	25. Chapter 25

_Author's Note: I am so sorry everyone. I just dropped the ball, for what? A year? and a half? I just want to finish this story, for everyone that stays with me thank you so much._

Donna stumbled into the library that morning, hung over like you wouldn't believe, maybe even still a little drunk. She'd barely been able to dress herself at all, what with all the loops and ribbons and yards and yards of fabric that made up an everyday outfit in nineteen thirteen. She'd been immensely grateful when she'd learned that Jenny had pulled a cooks duty that day and was able to keep James in the kitchen with her. Because there was no way she'd have the patience or attention span to keep an eye on him in the library. The little monster would have probably ripped at least three books up by now, goodness how he loved to destroy books.

"Ah, Mrs. Smith, there you are, I thought I'd wait for you to make sure you received the books I'd be returning," a falsely cheerful voice chirped the moment Donna neared her

Donna made sure her expression of contempt was securely held in check as she raised her eyes to regard the woman who had addressed her. "Nurse Redfern, you have books to return, yeah?" Donna asked, while holding her hands out expectantly for the books the Nurse held in her own arms. Nurse Redfern frowned, and took a step closer to Donna, who then in turn stepped back as well, "What is it?" Donna asked, hoping her tone sounded curious and amused instead of totally bitchy and demanding.

"Are you feeling well?" the shorter woman asked, once again stepping towards Donna, "You look..." she let her sentence drift off.

Donna huffed out an amused laugh, "Awful," she supplied, "Terrible, rundown."

Nurse Redfern glared at her fiercely, "Not in good health," she countered as she finally backed Donna straight into her desk. Redfern reached a hand forward and placed it on Donna's forehead briefly, but upon not finding a fever she removed it. She stared critically into Donna's eyes.

"Nurse Redfern," Donna said, acid lacing her tone, "I'm feeling quite well."

Redfern frowned, and Donna saw a flash of concern in Redferns eyes before the other woman turned away, "Yes, of course, I'm so sorry." Redfern placed the pile of books in her grasp on Donna's desk, "It is only that you are not the first to not look well, I saw Baines wandering the halls most curiously just before I entered the library. This odd grin on his lips. And little Timothy Latimer looks most unsettled."

It was then that Donna noticed the particularly pathetic slump to the nurse's shoulders and decided to stop being so mean and defensive. "And what about you?" Donna asked as she rested a hand far up on Redferns back, "You look a bit unsettled yourself."

The Nurse turned her face to regard Donna, "It's just the sound of those guns, they trouble me."

Donna nodded, just now noticing the rapid gunfire coming from the grounds, it was a common thing at the school and she'd mostly learned to ignore it. But some days it was so loud she thought she'd never hear anything again. She smiled at Redfern as she reached down and grabbed her hand; she tugged Redfern along further into the library. "Those guns give me such a blooming headache somedays, but I've learned," she turned a corner, "that if you stand," she turned another corner, "in the right spot," she edged behind a book shelf into an almost entirely blocked off alcove, "that you can't hear a thing."

Nurse Redfern smiled, awestruck, as silence, blessed silence, reigned down upon them. "My goodness," she said, "how ever did you discover this little nook?"

Donna shrugged and sank down on the incredibly old looking, giant and comfortable reading chair that was almost too big to fit in the alcove (also it smelled a bit of something unpleasant, but what was Donna going to do? Take her daily naps on the floor? No thank you). "I like to explore," she offered.

"You would have to," Redfern said, sinking down next to Donna, "to wander all the way to Australia and back."

"It wasn't as exciting as it sounds."

Redfern smiled at her and Donna got the uneasy feeling that the mutual hatred she'd thought they'd shared had really been quite one sided. "I've always wondered about your life before here. I'd convinced myself it would be rude to ask, but I don't think you care much about things such as that." Redfern shifted to be able to see more of Donna, she smiled and it lit up her whole face, "Your husband, Frank, you must have loved him so much to give up your life here in England. To go with him into the unknown."

Donna knew when a woman was asking for a story, one of those soppy stories that melted your heart and made you cry. And the story of Frank and Donna Smith was definitely that kind of story.

"It wasn't like that," Donna assured, "I never felt I was giving anything up."

Redfern leaned back into the cushion.

"The Do-Frank, he came into my life like a whirlwind, turned it completely upside down. Honestly, it terrified me, frightened me so much I almost said no," Donna said, thinking of the Racnoss and the poor despondent Doctor standing solidly in the snow.

"When he asked you to marry him? You almost said no?"

Donna nodded her head, "Yes, when he asked me to marry him."

"What changed your mind?"

"It was terrifying, but it was wonderful. It made my heart race just thinking about it, about going out on adventures, running, meeting everyone, everywhere, whenever I wanted, it was so exhilarating. He did that to me, he made me see what I could do, what _we_ could do together." Donna leaned back into the cushions, smiling now, "And it made me feel so special, him asking me. He could have asked anyone he wanted, anyone would have been a fool to say no, but he asked me. He asked a nobody like me."

"Mr. Smith has spoken of his brother to me, he speaks so wonderfully of him. And now your words as well, he sounds like a truly extraordinary man. You must miss him terribly."

Donna bit her lip and closed her eyes, nodding slowly.

"I did not mean to upset you. My own husband is dead, he was extraordinary as well."

Donna reached out to hold Redfern's hand, she squeezed it affectionately, "I'm so sorry, Nurse Redfern," Donna offered, and she actually meant it.

The other woman shook her head sadly, "War, and now we're to have another. What I would give for peace."

"It's all going to be alright, you know, in the end. We win, I mean, we will win." Donna squeezed the Nurses hand, smiling at her.

Redfern chuckled, "But of course," she offered sadly, "but the cost, Mrs. Smith, I can only think what the cost will be. All those young boys playing war in the yard now, they have no idea how terrible it will be. I have narry an idea either, just a dreadful feeling in my heart."

Donna remembered learning of the Second World War in school; it had seemed so far away. So unimportant.

It was then that Jenny came pelting into the alcove with James sitting calmly on her hip, she was already speaking before she saw the occupants of the chair, "Donna! I've just heard the most terrible thing-" it was then that she saw Nurse Redfern and she literally almost careened into a wall.

"What is it, Jenny?" Donna asked, motioning for Jenny to hand James over, upset by this talk of war and bloodshed.

Jenny stumbled over her words for a moment, shooting uneasy and terrified eyes at Redfern, before she stuttered out, "A baby in town was crushed by a piano."

Donna started to laugh, thinking that surely Jenny was joking.

Jenny glared at her.

"Oh my god, are you not joking?"

Jenny shook her head, "They were trying to move the piano through a second floor window when one of the ropes snapped, and the poor woman had the carriage right under it. I heard she was screaming so hard a physician had to sedate her."

"That's awful," Redfern muttered, her brows constricted in absolute pity.

Donna held James closer to herself for a moment, glad that it wasn't him, while at the same time feeling guilty for being glad it wasn't him.

Redfern looked between Jenny and Donna for a moment, "Well, I should go back to the infirmary, I'm sure there's some sort of injury there to take care of."

"I didn't mean to intrude," Jenny said quickly, "I must dash as well if you'd like to stay longer, ma'am."

Nurse Redfern shook her head as she passed by Jenny in the small space, "No, no, I must go. It was lovely to get to know you, Mrs. Smith."

After the nurse had left the alcove Jenny looked at Donna with wide eyes, "I thought you couldn't stand her!" she cried.

Donna shrugged, "Oh relax, love, I might have misjudged her a bit, that's all. And you're not going anywhere, go on, sit down; I have to apologize to you for putting up with me and Martha last night."

Jenny shook her head, "Cooks got me heading into town, is letting me borrow his bike and all. He'll be in a rage if I haven't picked up his list."

Donna rolled her eyes, "Oh come on then, I'll talk to Cook later and smooth him out. We haven't talked in ages."

Jenny smiled, "You are such a terrible influence on me, Donna Smith," she sighed as she sat on the comfy chair next to Donna.

**DISCLAIMER: Oh MY God, I had mono and I had a terribly realistic fever dream in which I WAS Russell Davis, but instead of being a writer for a television show I was a demented puppet master controlling real people to fit my view of the world.**


	26. Chapter 26

**Author's Note: I am feeling so not geared up for this particular episode anymore, so it's a bit rushed, sorry, ('cause i'm super excited for what i'm doing to blink and the master.)**

"Donna, I," John Smith cleared his throat and looked up at the ceiling awkwardly, "there's a...dance in town. Tonight, um, a dance..."

Donna smirked as she held a biscuit to Jamie.

"And, I'm aware you told Professor Farrel that you wouldn't be attending, but I wanted to...to tell you that it would mean the world to me...if, if you'd agree to accompany...me."

"John," Donna said, eyebrows raised as she waited patiently for John Smith to look at her. The blush on his cheeks was _almost_ endearing.

"It's quite last minute, I know, very rude of me, but it quite thoroughly slipped my mind until Nurse Redfern reminded me just yesterday."

"Nurse Redfern?" Donna inquired as she wiped a bit of food off of Jamie's chin, ignoring his affronted squak.

"She was quite adamant...that I should ask you. She seems to think you're...not as happy as you could be here. And, Donna, I know I am to blame for that." He leaned forward onto the table, both hands reaching for her left. He looked at her, brown eyes wide, "I can't imagine the sadness that dogs you, to have the man you _love_ ripped from you. I'm difficult, I know, but I only want for your happiness, and for your sons."

Donna's eyebrows constricted sadly, she sighed, "John," she started.

"I understand," he said sadly, looking down at the tabletop.

Donna rolled her eyes, how was it even possible for a grown man to look so much like a kicked puppy? It just wasn't right.

She brought her other hand to rest above his own, "Well, alright then," she stated brusquely, "I suppose a bit of a party never did anyone any harm."

John beamed up at her, his whole face lighting up, and Donna had to remind herself _'he's not real'_.

* * *

His eyes nearly popped out of his head when she walked into his rooms. "oh, Donna," he'd sighed, leaning against his fireplace as his eyes went from her feet to the top of her head and back. "You look beautiful," he finally offered with a smile.

She waved a dismissive hand, "Old Yolly Strand let me borrow the dress, it's a bit tight in the shoulders and-"

He cut her off, "It's perfect," he said, shaking his head in awe, "just perfect, just like you."

Donna snorted disbelievingly, "Yeah, well," she said, moving restlessly from one foot to the other, "best get a move on then, if we want to make it in time, yeah?"

He nodded, and moved about the room as he finished getting ready, but every other moment he'd glance at her and smile.

As they walked towards town he did most of the talking, not that she was listening at all. The ebb and flow of his voice, so similar to the Doctor's, was soothing and when he reached for her hand, she didn't pull away.

* * *

And then shit quite thoroughly hit the fan.

* * *

"Doctor! Doctor!" A voice cried out, the voice of a man that Donna had seen in town several times, a great fool of a man. Dead now. "Come back, Doctor! Come home, come and claim your prize!" Donna grit her teeth in a grimace, she knew Martha and the baby were in the Tardis. Martha having retreated there for just the night, to comfortably watch James in peace. Donna knew the Tardis was probably the safest place for them both, no army could break through those doors, but...

Donna crouched down in the woods; she glanced at John Smith next to her.

"Out you come Doctor, there's a good boy! Come to the family!" The thing inside Baines added.

"This is the ending, Doctor!" A plump woman screamed (farmer Mcdours wife, if Donna remembered correctly), shrill on the edge of being incomprehensible.

Donna glared at them and grabbed John's arm, attempting to pull him away. "Donna," he whispered, "what's happening?"

"I, John, it's all going to be alright. We just need to find the watch, that's all, no need to worry."

His face twisted in confusion, "Again with the watch, Donna, what is happening? That box," he said, pointing at the Tardis just out of their reach, "I've seen it, in my dreams. I see so much in my dreams, strange things, like what happened at the dance, and that box, and it doesn't stop you at all. Like you've seen it all before."

She pulled him up, "We just need the watch, John, we just-"

John snatched his arm from her grasp, "What will the watch do, Donna? What do we need it for? I heard you before; you said the Doctor was _in_ the watch? But I dream of the Doctor, _I_ am the Doctor."

"You're just John Smith," Donna bit back, harsher then she meant too as she walked away knowing he would follow.

"He's real then?" he asked, his voice broken. "Is it all real?" He snagged her wrist, pulled her back almost roughly and held her by her upper arms, "Is it real?" he questioned.

"Yes," she admitted, "It's, it's real. And right now, we need to find the watch, so we can wake up the Doctor. He'll save us."

"What about me?" he asked, his eyes shining. "What about me, Donna?"

She reached between them, resting a pale hand on the lapel of his jacket; she could feel the warmth of him through the material. "I don't know," she said, lying to him.

He snorted and shook his head, "Do I die, Donna? Do I?"

"No! No, of course not! You'll just...be different. You'll be the Doctor again, like it should be."

His big brown eyes swept over her face. "You're with me...in my dreams," he said at last, "James is my son."

"He is. He is your son, the Doctor's son," she admitted.

"But he's not yours; you didn't give birth to him, did you?"

"He is mine," she said strongly, "I may not have, you know, pushed him out, but he is mine, my son, _and_ yours."

John swept her into a tight embrace, she could feel his breath in her hair and the sobs he was trying to keep contained, "God Donna, we'll run, won't we? You and me and the universe."

"Anywhere in time," she countered as her own arms snaked around his waist.

His hands were in her hair, "We've got a watch to find then."

* * *

Right before opening the watch that good little Timothy returned to him he grabbed Donna, pressed her against a tree and kissed her. Kissed her like a dying man, Donna tried to forget that he _was_ dying...and he didn't even know it. He ran his hands through her hair, up her sides, ground his body against hers, invaded her mouth with his tongue, and left her gasping for breath. _'He's not real'_ she told herself.

He stepped away; face contorted in sorrow, and opened the watch.

* * *

The Doctor defeated the Family.

The Doctor no longer looked her in the eye.

**DISCLAIMER: You are hereby disclaimed, ser.**


	27. Chapter 27

**Author's Note: wooooooo, yeahhhhhhhhh,,,,,,,,,,,wowo.**

"Why are we here?" Donna asked as she adjusted James on her hip.

The Doctor ducked his head before replying, looking down at a strange little device he'd plucked from the Tardis controls before leaving the time machine. "To investigate," he said, lacking the enthusiasm Donna had hoped for.

Martha looked between the two, biting her lip before breaking the weird, weird tension. "Investigating what then? All a bit Scooby-Doo with this creepy house."

Donna took a moment to look up at the impressive, yet quite creepy house they were making their way towards. Martha stayed behind with her and James; the Doctor though did not slow his stride and quietly slipped into the house.

"What is this?" Martha said, her arms crossing as she turned a raised eyebrow towards Donna. "Since nineteen-thirteen it's been weird, what's going on? You said nothing happened, that the Doctor woke up and he was fine."

"It's just," Donna shook her head, "It is nothing, Martha, I think he's upset because..." Donna started walking again, ignoring James twittering to himself at her side. "I tricked him."

"What, the Doctor?"

"No," Donna licked her lips, "John Smith, I tricked him. I made him think," She swallowed, "made him think he'd see the stars with me."

"He wasn't real though?" Martha questioned, "What does it matter?"

"He remembers, the Doctor, I think he remembers being John Smith."

"Oh, so he didn't die then, he is seeing the stars with you."

Donna looked at her friend, her friend who kind of, sort of, not really, but actually yes, fancied the Doctor just a bit. "He kissed me."

Martha's mouth opened, a disbelieving sound escaping her throat before her eyes narrowed, not quite mad, but a little hurt, a little jealous. "Who did?" she questioned.

"John Smith, right before he opened the watch. I made him think we'd travel the universe together, then he kissed me, and then he died."

Martha laid a hand on Donna's shoulder as they ascended the porch stairs, "He didn't die, Donna, he wasn't real."

They entered the house and fell silent as they observed the Doctor getting quite intimate with the wall. "What are you doing?" Donna screeched, "Why are you licking the wall?"

The Doctor shrugged, "There's residue here, faint, but definitely temporal."

"You can't _do_ that," Donna gestured down at Jamie, giggling and reaching out towards the Doctor, "next he'll be licking walls, and it won't be cute. People with think he's a freak."

"He won't be a freak," the Doctor said hotly, turning away so he wouldn't look at her as he continued, "he'll be a Time Lord using all the senses he was born with to investigate a temporal anomoly! If you didn't want a Time Lord for a son maybe you should have pushed out your own spawn."

Donna took a step back, shaking her head as she fought back tears, "Well," she said, "I think Jamie and I are going to 'investigate' the upstairs, if that's alright with you, _Time Lord_." Donna spun on her heel and raced up the stairs, Jamie clinging to the lapels of her jacket as she made her hasty retreat to seclusion.

She heard Martha from down the stairs, right after she gained the landing, "What is your problem?" the younger woman hissed accusingly at the Doctor.

"Let's just see what we find up here, eh Jamie?" Donna asked as she opened the first door on her left. There was statue there, standing tall in the middle of the room in the remains of a rusted bed frame. James started squirming as soon as he saw it, insisting to be put down. Donna laughed as she plopped him down on his little legs, "Alright then, no need for hysterics." She closed the door quietly; to make certain James wouldn't fall down the stairs, as she looked at the statue of an angel, a woman with her hands over her face.

"What are you doing here, hmmm?" she questioned the angel, glancing down at Jamie as he teetered his way around the thing, a wary look in his eye. Donna kneeled down and looked at her baby boy in concern, "James, what is it? Jamie?"

"Donna!" the Doctor called, his voice panicked, "Donna!" At his tone Donna turned her head, glancing at the closed door before standing and trying to grab James...who was no longer where he had been.

"Jamie?" she said, edging around the statue to make sure he wasn't just hidden behind the things skirt. "Jamie?" she called, louder this time, when she didn't find him. She turned her head frantically, searching the tiny room, and upon finding it empty raced towards the door. "DOCTOR!" she screamed.

And then something touched her shoulder.

* * *

She was knocked against a rubbish bin and proceeded to vomit all over the alley wall before collapsing to the ground in a heap. "oh god," she gasped, looking out at the almost pitch black alley around her, "Doctor?" she called weakly, "Doctor?"

There was a light at the end of the alley; someone with a torch was running towards her. She tried to scamper back, but couldn't find the strength.

"It's her! I've found her! Sally, it's Donna!" An accented voice called, a mans voice.

Donna brought her hand up to cover her eyes against the torch light. "Who are you?" Donna called, "How'd you know my name?"

The man behind the light stopped a little ways away from her, directing his light down at the ground instead of in her face. He was an older man, with a kind smile and twinkling eyes, "I was told you'd be here, on this night, in this alley, by the Doctor thirty two years ago." He held a hand out to her, "My name's Billy."

He helped her up, steadied her when she swayed, "I have someone who wants to see you very much, I think," he said with a smile.

Just then a woman came huffing into the alley, an older woman with grey roots and dyed brown hair and a very familiar little boy in her arms. "Mum!" the boy cried, wriggling in the womans grip, desperately reaching for Donna, "Muuuum!"

Donna raced forwards on unsteady legs, wrenching the boy from the womans grasp and squeezing him tightly. "Oh Jamie, you gave me such a fright," she cooed, noticing after a moment that he weighed more than he had a moment ago, that he was bigger and harder to hold then before. She leaned back to look at him.

He was older, at least a few months.

"What happened?" Donna screeched, directing her question at Billy. "Where are we? Where's the Doctor? What happened?"

The woman held up an aged envelope, 'Donna' scrawled on top. Billy nodded to it, "Your Doctor wrote that for you, and gave it to me, to give to you, thirty two years ago."

Donna blinked and studied the envelope before reaching for it with a shaking hand.

_Donna_, the note inside the envelope began.

_You've been displaced in time by a Weeping Angel, just listen to Billy_.

"What? Are you kidding me?" Donna mumbled as she threw the note to the ground. He was so angry about the John Smith thing he couldn't even write her a proper account of things? Like why her son was suddenly months older then he had been? And what the hell is a Weeping Angel?

Billy put a gentle hand on Donna's shoulder, and smiled as he waved a hand at the woman with the dyed brown hair. "Donna, this is my wife Sally. Sally Shipton."

* * *

Billy and Sally lived in a mansion and wanted for nothing because Billy knew exactly when to invest in a thing, and exactly when to pull out. He knew when a certain band would be popular, when a certain country would collapse, and when a key technological advancement would make its first appearance. They welcomed Donna into this comfortable life, a life of decadence that she'd never imagined and still found herself balking at. They were nice people though, so nice, and had been caring for James since the Angel first sent him to them almost three months ago.

"When will he come for me?" she'd asked Billy. "Do you know?"

"No, poor girl," he'd shaken his head, "I don't know that, only that he will."

"What year is it?" she'd asked.

"Two thousand one," he'd said.

She must have smiled because right away he continued, "There's already a Donna Noble in two thousand one," he'd said seriously.

And so Donna pretended to be Sally's cousin's daughter and lived her life for almost a month. A month of waiting for the Doctor in peace with a loving Billy and Sally, who had already grown quite attached to little Jamie and easily fit Donna into their hearts as well. It was nice. Donna liked it quite a bit (especially because she knew it wouldn't last forever.)

One day though, as Donna walked out of a coffee shop with half a bagel stuffed in her mouth she saw something that she'd almost forgotten. Something she wished had never happened. A young Donna Noble, circa two thousand one, was across the street, being berated loudly by a tall man with a goatee and sunglasses. A man named Paul. A monster named Paul who dragged the woman six inches shorter then himself into a shadowed corner and smacked her full across the face.

Donna, older now, turned quickly, her eyes snapping shut as she marched away, shaking as she thought she felt the sting on her cheek where his blow had landed.

**DIsclaimer: blergen blorgen fllourt blgot sjerten.**


	28. Chapter 28

**Author's Note: I just bought a new backpack and it is _amazing_. It's the only new backpack I've ever owned in my whole life. It's PLUM colored, the color of a plum.**

Sally came later that day, her wrinkled face pulled taught in poorly hidden concern. She placed a steaming cup of tea into Donna's hands and sat her down in the dining room. "Is something wrong, Donna?" she'd asked.

Donna shook her head as she drew the cup towards her lips, "No, of course not," she'd mumbled before taking a sip of tea.

"Girl..." Sally began, her hand reaching out to grasp Donna's arm gently, "I know something is bothering you. If it's anything I can help, please, just speak to me of it."

Donna looked up at the older woman and thought that perhaps she _could _confide in her. What would Sally think though? Would she think of Donna differently, after all Donna's dirty laundry had been aired out before her curious eyes? Donna had told her mother once, about Paul, about what he did to her, Donna had appeared on her Mum and Dad's stoop with her eyes swollen almost shut and her lip split. Her mother had handed her a tissue, gently smoothed circles on her back...and had told her that this sort of thing was best kept behind closed doors and dealt with between partners. Donna still remembered, would always remember, the red hot shame that flooded her at her mothers words and disgusted eyes.

She didn't speak to her mother for almost a year after that, and had never asked for her help in anything ever again.

"Everything's fine, Sally," Donna said with a smile.

Sally patted her arm slowly, the concern in her eyes never wavering, "I'm here, girl, just know that."

* * *

Paul died December 12th, two thousand one, Donna remembered as she gazed at the calendar hanging in the Shipton's kitchen. Paul died in four days. It was funny really, how it could have snuck up on her. Time travel could mess everything about.

He'd beaten her so savagely the day before his death she'd had to go to the hospital; she'd had to stay overnight. And when she'd come home to their rundown little flat the next morning she was welcomed by three uniformed police and Paul's body sprawled on the living room floor.

It had been the happiest day of her life for a long time.

* * *

Donna borrowed one of Billy's cars and drove into town the next day, she parked across the street from her old flat, the one Paul and her had shared, and stayed there for close to two hours. She sat there and watched. She saw her younger self leave for work, her hurried steps reminding Donna that she'd been late that day, even though she'd ran the last block. She hunkered down in her seat when Paul sauntered out the door.

He looked about as he lit a cigarette and took a slow drag; he smiled that little half smile he'd always worn, the same one his corpse always wore in Donna's nightmares. In reality his face had been as relaxed as she'd ever seen it, the tension drained from his brow and the unhappy lines around his mouth wiped away. With a shiver from the cold wind he started walking down the street, head turned from her parked car. He was headed to his cousins' place, Donna knew. He'd come back in a rage, jealous over the new television his cousin had bought, he was always jealous of his cousin.

After a little while she slipped back up into her seat proper and started the engine, pulled out and made it all the way to the next light before she broke down in tears. Wishing absurdly that the Doctor was with her, _in_ the car right next to her, his silly hair touching the low roof. She wished he would appear in his magical blue box and whisk her away, somewhere warm and far away from the bitter cold winter that had changed her life. Donna wasn't too sure about how well he would dispel sympathy or comfort, both of with she wanted just then, but his mere presence would have been enough. A hug would have been enough, a hug from anyone really, but she was sure his skinny little paper cut arms wrapped around her would have made it all a little better.

* * *

She came back the next day and smiled just a little as young her and Paul stumbled out of their flat, both laughing as his arm wrapped around her shoulders. Donna sped away once the pair had made it down the block. She made it all the way to the Shipton's house before she vomited up her lunch. Tonight Billy would beat his fiery red-headed girlfriend with a broom handle, screaming at her that she'd been flirting with his cousin, that she was a nasty slut. He'd shove her, bleeding and dazed, out the door and into the street. Donna, if she closed her eyes and concentrated, could still feel the splintered wood connecting with her temple, but she could also remember the warmth of his arm wrapped around her.

Sally came to her later, the frown on her face making her look ten years older than she was. "I tried the coffee shop you talked about, had a bagel and all. Oh, and I gave this poor girl a ride to the hospital this afternoon," she said. Her serious eyes boring into Donna with an intensity Donna didn't like.

Donna remembered very little from after she was beaten to when she awoke in a hospital bed.

"What?" Donna asked, her tone angry, and she didn't quite know why.

"There was this girl, bleeding, stumbling, beaten, just walking down the street. I thought it was you, _this_ you, at first, you both wear your hair the same. Why didn't you tell me, Donna? When I asked you, why didn't you tell me, for god's sake?"

Donna didn't know what to say. "What would you have done?" she screeched, suddenly on the defensive. "It's all already happened once, it's not like you could have helped me! Not like you could have stopped it!"

"You could have talked to me, Donna," Sally said as she shook her head, "I know I couldn't have helped _her_, but I can help you, Donna."

Sally looked at her with concerned eyes, sympathetic eyes, eyes that held no judgment. But Sally had blue eyes, a darker shade than Sylvia Noble's, but blue all the same. And when Donna looked them, all she could see were her mother's eyes, eyes that told her she had to help herself, because no one else would want too.

Donna turned away from Sally, and didn't turn when the older woman called her name.

* * *

She came back the next day. _The_ day.

Donna sat in the car, shivering despite the heat coming through the vents. Her hands gripped the steering wheel so hard her knuckles were white; she couldn't look at the flat door. He was in there dying. Or was he already dead? She didn't know. The police had never given her an exact death time, why would they? She could call for help. She _should_ be calling for help, she thought, that's what good people do. If she were a good person she'd call an ambulance, she told herself, yet didn't reach for her phone.

She _couldn't_ call for help though, because this had already happened once. She knew Paul died on December 12th, it had happened, she'd seen his body, it had already happened. Her heart was pounding wildly in her chest though, guilt gnawing at her as she rested her head against the steering wheel. He was in there, now, dying, she could save him, but what would that do? Would it warp the timeline? Would it destroy the universe? Would she ever have found the strength to leave him? Would he have beaten her to death one day, if he hadn't died first?

Donna looked up sharply, her eyes brimming with unshed and unwanted tears, as someone opened the passenger side door. The Doctor slipped into the seat.

**Disclaimer: I just want things so desperately! Why don't things just belong to me for no reason! WWWHHYY?**


	29. Chapter 29

**Author's Note: affirmation pppllleeeeeaaaaassssseee, no but really i would love some feedback, because mostly it's my sister and brother and they never say anything nice...like ever...about anything, not even themselves.**

He slid into the car and as he did so Donna slammed her eyes shut. She nearly smashed her face into the steering wheel as her back bowed and she crumpled in her seat, sobbing as she gripped the wheel in a death grip.

Donna heard the creaking of his leather seat before she felt his hand descend on her back, resting there with his long fingers held still. "Donna," he said quietly as his other hand came to rest on top of her own on the steering wheel.

She felt like she was hyperventilating, like there wasn't enough air in the little car, and with that thought she lunged for her door. But the Doctor's hand on her back was suddenly an arm encased around her shoulders, he held her in her seat as he contorted himself over the arm rest. "Donna, come on," he hushed, rocking them slightly, "Just breath, that's it, deep breaths."

"I murdered him!" she choked out as she tried to shake out of the Doctor's grip. His presence was suddenly overwhelming, the concern she knew would be in his eyes (wished for not that long ago) now unwelcome. "Oh my god, oh god, what have I done?"

"You didn't, Donna, listen to me," the Doctor said, his voice strong, "you've done nothing wrong."

She looked up at him, neck bent at an uncomfortable angle to be able to look him in the eye, "He's dying in there! Oh god, I could have rung an ambulance, but I didn't...I didn't do it...oh god."

"It's a fixed point in time, Donna, you couldn't change it, listen to me."

"I still could, we need to call an ambulance," she fumbled for her phone, her hand shaking as the Doctor grabbed it and held it in a firm grip. She looked up at him in surprise, "It's what you do, save people," she said softly.

"We can't change this," he said, raising the hand in his grip to hold it against his chest.

Her unsteady breath became even more eratic and her whole body shook in the effort to control her tears, "Why?" she gasped.

"Some things you can change, you can save people," he said, "but sometimes you can't change it. It's the way it always has to be."

"And you can tell?" she asked desperately, "You can tell when we can't change it? Are you sure?"

He squeezed her round the shoulders softly, "I'm certain, Donna, and this is the way it has to be. You couldn't have done anything; it's not your fault. I promise, Donna."

Her gaze caught on where his hand was encasing her own against his chest, his thumb rubbing back and forth over her knuckles. "I...but I'm glad too, is that horrible, and I shouldn't be, should I? I'm glad he-"

The Doctor fell back into his seat, dragging her bodily across the car, cutting her off thoroughly. When they came to rest Donna was wrapped up in his long skinny arms, sitting half on his lap, half on the arm rest between the passenger and driver seats. Her ear was pressed against his chest, and she could swear she heard the twin beating of his hearts as he rested his chin against the top of her head. She wanted to rage and struggle, she didn't deserve his comfort or his support, but she stayed still in his embrace and rubbed the moisture from her eyes, trying to collect herself, to put up the brave front she had worn all her life.

"That...it only makes sense, Donna, it's not horrible, it's just..."

"I'm glad he died," she continued, as if he hadn't said anything at all. "I'm happy, because...I wouldn't have left," she went on, her voice muffled against his chest.

His arms around her tightened uncomfortably, he shook his head but didn't say anything.

They sat there quietly until a police car pulled in front of the building, and then another, and then a while after that the coroners van. When the body was wheeled out, covered and zipped in a bag, Donna still shook, remembering his little smirk. The little smirk she still saw in her nightmares, years and years after his death, after years and years of knowing he would never touch her again. A little while after that Donna felt the Doctor's whole body grow rigid, his arms suddenly stiff and holding her tightly against himself, pulling her fully into his lap. She didn't have to look to know exactly who he had just seen hobbling up the street.

She remembered what she'd looked like that day, bruised, swollen, and beaten.

She didn't turn to see.

"Let's get a move on," she said brusquely, all elbows as she maneuvered her way back to her seat. "Come on," she said with an undignified sniff of her nose and one last sweep of her eyes.

The Doctor rubbed at his chest were one of her flying elbows had hit him square, he looked at her, his eyes sad.

Donna cleared her throat as she started the motor and began to pull out of their space, "Where's Martha?"

The Doctor finally looked away from her as he buckled his seat belt, "She's waiting at Billy and Sally's."

"So you've seen Jamie then?" Donna asked, apprehension growing, because once again the Doctor had quite thoroughly missed a solid chunk of his sons life.

"No," he said, "no, I needed to find you first."

"Oh," Donna said, unsure what exactly he meant by that. "Doctor," she said with a sideways glance at him, "James was here for a bit more than me, the statue got him first, sent him earlier."

The Doctor's gripped the arm rest tightly, "How old is he?" he asked, smiling at her, "Don't tell me he's as tall as you now," he joked, but Donna knew, could see in his eyes, the pain of losing so much time.

"No, no," she said with a shake of her head as they passed through an intersection, "he was here for about three months before me, and we've been here together for about one."

He didn't look as though he had anything to say, or at least anything he wanted to share with her so she continued, "Can't shut his gob that one, you'll see, he knows so many words. Can't put them together in any way at all, not in sentances, full ones at least. Can't quite say his L's." She glanced at him again, pouting softly without meaning too as she watched the conflicted emotions flickering across the Doctor's brow. "He's so smart," she finished, suddenly somber, "Those Time Lord genes, wonders those are."

"Donna," the Doctor said as he turned in his seat to regard her profile fully, "I need to say that I'm sorry about what I said. Right before the Angel sent you here, I...do you remember?"

"Yeah," she said softly as she turned the car, "I remember."

The Doctor tugged on his seatbelt to keep it from digging into his shoulder as he leaned forward, not quite touching her, but close, "You're a brillia-"

"I'm sorry I kissed you," Donna steamrolled quickly, cutting him off.

The Doctor's mouth worked soundlessly for a second before Donna continued. "In nineteen thirteen, well, I suppose it wasn't you really, John Smith, I'm sorry I kissed him." Her foot pressed on the gas harder than necessary, sending them careening down the street, "And I lied to him, I'm sorry, but it was the only way for you to get out of that blooming watch!" Her foot slammed down on the brakes as they came to an intersection, halting them within a hands breath of another vehicles backend.

"I, I couldn't think of another way then to tell him everything he wanted to hear," she gesticulated wildly, eyes intent on the car ahead of them. "It's all my fault, this, all this," she said as she flapped a hand between himself and her, "god, I'm so stupid, Doctor I'm so sorry."

"Don't say that, Donna," he said, shaking his head as he returned to sitting the right way in his seat, "you're not stupid, you're brilliant." He chose to ignore Donna rolling her eyes at that. He ran a hand through his hair, ruffling the already well ruffled coif on top of his head. "And you shouldn't be sorry, I'm the one-" he stopped himself, "he's the one who kissed _you_, Donna. He knew you were lying, and he did it all anyway."

"He knew?" Donna asked incredulously, replaying the moment John Smith opened the watch. He had looked at her with tears in his eyes, an agonized expression on his face, as if, as if...he'd known all along.

"When you're about to lie you tilt your head," the Doctor said, grinning slightly.

"Why did he do it then?!" she screeched, suddenly furious. "Why did he do it if he knew that was the end of him?!"

"He knew it would make you happy," the Doctor said, looking out his window, his hand cradling his chin as if he were observing the weather and not breaking Donna's heart.

Donna, composure in place, took the unexpected blow with crumpled brow, her head turning away from the Doctor for a moment. They had left the intersection behind when it occurred to Donna that the Doctor knew an awful lot about what John Smith thought. "Do you remember being him?" she asked.

"Yes," the Doctor said, quiet now that they were nearing Billy's place, nearing the son he wanted desperately to see, to hold.

"He loved me," Donna muttered.

The Doctor turned to regard her, his expression an interesting mix of emotions, but through all that Donna still had no idea what he was really thinking.

Donna shook her head with a disbelieving and sad snort, "The poor sod."

The Doctor frowned and turned away.

* * *

Jamie, all bundled in his coat, was giggling madly while Martha chased him around the Shipton's front garden as Donna pulled the car into the drive. Before the car had even fully stopped the Doctor had bounded out his door, long coat flipping wildly in the wind as he strode towards the little boy now noticing his fathers presence. James eyes widened, he pelted forward, as fast as his little legs would carry him. His little hands grasping in front of him as he beamed up at the much taller being who suddenly swept him up in a tight embrace. Both boy and father laughed, their beaming faces resembling each other for a moment before Donna blinked and remembered that James didn't look at all like the Doctor.

"Oh that's my brilliant boy!" The Doctor cried, swaying with the boy sprawled happily against his chest, held their safely with the Doctor's arms wrapped around him. "I've missed you, yes I have, my little James."

James smiled up at him, showing off an impressive collection of teeth, "Doctor!" he cried happily, bouncing in his fathers grasp.

Donna blanched immedietly, all those days of telling Jamie that they're waiting for the Doctor, that the Doctor will come for them, that the Doctor will come with the blue box, that the Doctor was the man with the pointy hair, do you remember him? All those days came rushing back and she instantly realized that she'd made a terrible mistake, realized that she should have been saying 'Daddy' will be coming for us, 'Daddy' with the pointy hair and wide smile. She looked apprehensively at the Doctor, and flinched as she saw the naked hurt laid bare in his eyes as he stood speechless looking at his baby boy that wasn't really a baby anymore. She rushed forward and brushed Jamie's hair away from his face, "No, James," she laid a hand on the Doctor's chest, tapping it, "Daddy," she said.

Jamie scrunched his face in confusion, and wiggled in the Doctor's grasp until he was put down. "Doctor!" he cried as he began once again to pounce at Martha, "Doctor! Doctor!"

**DISCLAIMER: SADNESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS**


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